The Balance of Things
by Jamille Shane
Summary: Uhura has always known that if it's too good to be true, maybe it is. But then again, maybe it isn't. Whatever it is, she's confused.
1. Chapter 1

The balance of things had shifted between a fellow officer and herself. As a result, she had been unable to sleep until the wee hours of the morning. Nyota forced herself out of bed and into her bathroom to get ready for the day ahead of her on the bridge. Her mind went back to the day things had begun to change between herself and Mister Spock; and then there was the day after that, when they had truly shifted for good. And then the truth of everything came out and she felt like her world was crumbling. She had pulled herself together, gotten past it as best she could on her own and now…things had changed again.

####

The ship's party was for Ensign Cleary who was on her way to a new assignment. She had received a promotion to a bridge post on a new starship, the _USS Potempkin_. The congratulatory party was all Nurse Chapel's idea. Uhura hadn't really known the young lady all that well, but she felt obligated as a bridge officer to show up with a smile on her face and an appropriate parting gift. She told herself that maybe a party was all she needed to get her spirits out of the dumps.

Nyota had received bad news on top of more bad news the month before. First she learned that her brother's estate had suffered a devastating brush fire. They had gotten it under control quickly enough, but not before it consumed part of her brother's home. To make things substantially worse, a week later while trying to help clear the post-fire debris in the yard near the house her young niece had nearly died when she feel through a sinkhole in the ground. She was rescued in a timely manner, but Nyota felt worse than she already had for not being able to be there for her family during times like that.

Then she found out her best friend had suffered a devastating shuttlecraft accident on Alpha Centauri and was lying in a coma. The last straw was finding out about another old friend of hers from her Academy days that had died on an away mission with her starship.

Everything had happened, one thing after another, over less than two weeks time. But she had been unable to recover herself since then. She felt as if she were waiting to get one more call with just one more piece of bad news. Everyone seemed to notice that she didn't smile the way she used to. She also hadn't sung in the mess hall for weeks. She would go, pick up her meal, try to chat a little and that was it for being social. Most times she didn't even finish the meal on her plate.

Even while she was down, she remained guardedly optimistic. She kept telling herself that everything was going to be all right. Her brother's house was already nearly repaired. A few weeks more and he claimed it would be good as new. Her niece had recovered and she'd spoken to her the week before about all of the cards and gifts her aunt had sent to her while she recovering. Her brother said the little lady was already running around the house again wreaking havoc.

Her friend that had been injured in the near-fatal accident was already on the road to recovery having awoken from the coma within a few days of slipping into it. And she had to contend that her friend that had died on the away mission had signed up for the dangerous life just as much as herself. That could very well be her any day now, she always knew that.

So on the night of the party, she put herself into a nice dress, added a little make-up to her features and forced herself to practice her happy face in the mirror beforehand.

She attended the party like she had planned to and wore that smile on her face. Everyone seemed satisfied that she was herself again. She begged off with a sore throat when asked to sing. Because of it, she claimed, she was going to go and turn in early. Dr. McCoy asked her to come and have it checked out if it wasn't gone within a day. She promised she would do so.

Mr. Spock watched Lieutenant Uhura closely. She was there at the party, physically present. But he sensed she was most certainly not there in spirit. He wondered that those about her did not notice the lieutenant had still not returned to her previous state of being. In fact the entire ship had noticed her sadness nearly within days of its beginning. But most assumed that that state had lifted. He did not agree.

He noticed that her smile was put-on, her actions were a little too merry and she seemed to be forcing herself into an artificial state of happiness. He could not help but wonder, what had happened to cause someone so genuine and full of life to behave falsely while still deflated on the inside?

####

As soon as she entered her quarters she found her smile dropping and she sat down on her bed, exhausted. Being truthful with herself, she knew she needed someone to talk to. Then her chimer rang.

"Come in," she said as she forced herself to stand and pretend to be busy about tidying her quarters. The door opened. "Mister Spock?" she asked. "Is there something I've left undone on the bridge, sir? I can go straight there now," she said, making ready to grab her uniform.

He put up his hand to stop her. "You are, as usual, a very efficient officer. That is not the reason I have decided to pay you a visit this evening, lieutenant," he said as he entered her quarters.

As the door whooshed shut behind him, she stood there and found herself at a loss for words. She had been serving aboard the Enterprise for over four years and never once had the first officer come to her quarters. She had been to his a few times to learn how to use his lyre but that had been the extent of their social contact. "Sit down, please," she offered him a seat. Seeing him in her quarters was the first true inkling of curiosity she'd had in weeks. He found a chair at her desk, pulled it out and sat in it. Uhura sat down on her bunk and simply looked at the first officer. He was at least half a room away from her. "Can I get you anything, sir?"

"No, I am quite satiated from the refreshments at the social gathering we just attended, lieutenant."

She felt terribly. Had he been there? She hadn't even noticed. To be honest, she hadn't noticed anyone there except…well…no one. Was she still that much in a fog? "What brings you by this evening, sir?" she asked with a polite smile.

"The morale of the crew, lieutenant."

Confused, she asked, "What about crew morale, sir?"

"It has come to my attention that one of the officers that seem to bolster crew morale has not been behaving the way she usually does and everyone seems to have noticed," he said with one rise of his eyebrow.

Uhura found herself smiling at him genuinely. "Thank you, sir, I appreciate the concern, but I'm fine now. I went to the party and I feel much better."

"That is unlike yourself, as well, lieutenant. Three times tonight I have heard you speak a falsehood."

"Do you have proof of that?"

"I do not believe you have a sore throat, you are not, as you have stated 'fine now' and you most certainly do not 'feel better'."

Uhura wondered what had suddenly gone awry in the galaxy. Mr. Spock was in her quarters claiming to understand human behavior, in particular her behavior. "Sir, do you have any reference for knowing these things?"

"Lieutenant, I have seen my mother feign happiness many times. I did not understand why until this evening. You do not wish to burden others with whatever it is that is troubling you. However, I also cannot help but notice that others at the party were taken in by your behavior. They believe you are well. I do not," he said simply.

She looked down at the tops of her legs and wondered, "Sir, I'm sorry, but I still don't understand what brought you here this evening."

He waited until she looked up at him again. As his eyes held hers, he admitted, "It brings me great discomfort, lieutenant, to know that there is something troubling you so severely you have ceased to behave as yourself. We have previously had limited social contact, however as your superior officer I cannot allow you to continue to suffer in silence. Perhaps there is something I can do for you to alleviate your situation, whatever it is."

She turned her face away from looking at his as her eyes filled with tears. This was a superior officer wanting to know why his subordinate wasn't doing so well. Is that all this was? "Sir, I don't think you're capable of giving me what I need."

He had not expected to hear those words come from her. Ordinarily, he supposed, they would not matter to him. But something about the state of mind he was in…upon hearing those words, they stung. "Is there some reason you believe that to be true, lieutenant?"

She sighed and thought _what I need is a shoulder to cry on. Someone who's not going to call me 'lieutenant' or just by my last name. I need a true friend who's going to ask how I am simply to ask how I am and not just because he's my superior. That's what I need. _"I just do, sir."

He stood then, ready to go. But before he exited her quarters, he stopped in his tracks, his back still to her as his face turned slightly. All she saw was his side profile as he said, "If there is anything you need, lieutenant, feel free to come by my quarters. I will do my utmost to help you."

She went to bed that night as soon as he was gone. It had lifted her spirits, somewhat, that he noticed she was unwell and had gone out of his way to check up on her. Well not out of his way, she kept reminding herself, his quarters weren't too far from hers. But still, it felt good to know that maybe Spock someday and she could become closer friends.

And then the next day arrived and her world was turned upside down.

####

It was her day off. She still didn't know what she was going to do with that day off, but she knew she still wasn't feeling completely like herself. She decided, at first, that maybe she would spend the day inside after all.

After finding herself slipping back into melancholia, Uhura forced herself to get up, into the bathroom to get cleaned up and got into her uniform. As she was exiting her bathroom putting the finishing touches on her hair, her chimer sounded. "Come in!" she called as she put down her brush. She was only halfway surprised to see Mr. Spock entering her quarters. "Sir?" she asked.

"I have come to enquire as to your mood today, lieutenant."

"As my superior officer," she said as she sat down on her bed.

Did he detect sarcasm in her tone? "Yes."

She found herself rolling her eyes. "You don't have to worry about me anymore, sir. I'll be fine, all right? I'm sure you're a busy person and you don't need to check up on me anymore."

"Lieutenant," he said as he stepped closer, "do I detect anger in your voice?"

She felt instantly ungrateful. "Sir, I'm sorry, I just-" She sighed tiredly. "It's been a bad few weeks and I haven't had a chance to get it all out and…I'm sorry."

"If you would perhaps avail yourself of me, I could be of assistance."

The mischievous side of her came to the fore and she figured she would call his bluff to see just how quickly he went flying out of her quarters. "Sit down," she said as she patted the spot next to her on her bunk. She was surprised when he took the offer and sat down almost directly next to her. She wondered how far she should take this and then said, "I would feel much better if you called me by my first name. If I'm going to spill my guts to you I at least want to pretend we're real friends."

He seemed taken aback. "I was under the impression, Nyota, we were at least on the path to a true friendship."

She looked away from him. Why had she liked the way he said her first name? Oh damn. How long had she been on the same ship with him and escaped becoming infatuated with him like half the female crew members? Then she decided that lying to herself was not healthy. She had certainly noticed him on many occasions, had a little bit of a crush on him, too, but she had simply marked him as 'unattainable' in her mind and as a result had gone on about her business without giving him another thought. So why now, while he was sitting on her bunk next to her, was she suddenly having these thoughts about him of all people? She had been trying to bluff him and here he was, bluffing her back!

"You're right, Spock," she said. It felt strange to not add 'mister' to his name. "Anyhow, this is the situation."

Since he was there wanting to hear of how she was doing, she figured she would really let him have it. She told him of everything that had happened the month before and how she'd found herself sinking into a depression afterward. She saw him sit there, taking it all in, and wondered what was going through his mind through it all. "You must think I'm terribly weak to have come apart over all that's happened. But I'm sure with more time I'll be back to my usual self and I've made sure my work on the bridge hasn't suffered, either. I just wonder sometimes, if I were to go tomorrow on an away mission or something, besides a career in Starfleet, what else am I getting out of my existence?"

His head cocked to the side as he thought of what she had just said to him. "What would make you assume I would find you weak for your reaction and your thoughts surrounding the many misfortunes that have plagued your friends and family members?"

She shrugged. "To tell you the truth, sir, you seem so strong and steady. I could never see you coming apart after so much bad news. It would be business as usual for you, at least on the surface. It's not that I don't think it would affect you. I know it would. But you would be able to make certain no one realized that it had affected you and that takes _real_ strength. I just don't have that kind of strength," she said almost casually with a wave of her hand.

"Nyota," he said, as if her words had struck him deeply, "you are one of the strongest people I know. And despite all that has happened, your work has remained up to par and constant. That is due to _your_ strength."

"But if only we could all be more like you, Spock, and not show our feelings," she said as she turned to face him directly. "I made the mistake in the past of assuming you didn't have any. But I know better now. If only we could all learn to control them the way you control yours. Life would be a lot more orderly."

His left hand was resting next to hers on her bunk. As she looked down at it she realized how attractive she found his fingers; and before her eyes she saw his fingers inch over and slowly begin to stroke hers. She looked up at his face to see that his eyes were staring into hers. "You are already complete the way you are, Nyota. Never wish you were any other way."

She could barely breathe. Spock's fingers were brushing against the backs of hers and her heart rate jumped. She found herself turning her hand over and offering him her palm. He laced his fingers together with hers as their palms caressed and she felt bursts of emotions from him, _admiration…protectiveness…desire._ "I think I've misunderstood you on many levels," she realized as she felt his fingers then unlace from hers and begin rubbing along the insides of her palm. She was beginning to tremble inside and she forgot in those few seconds that this was her superior, a fellow bridge officer, that he was a Vulcan and that this supposedly should not be happening between them.

"Are things more obvious to you now about my thoughts concerning you?" he almost whispered as his deep eyes held to hers.

"No," she admitted. "I'm even more confused."

"Then I must clarify the situation further," he said as his face came close to hers, slowly.

Before contact occurred, she wondered for a split second if she were in a strange dream. She wondered if he was infected with something making him act abnormally. She wondered if she had slipped into an alternate universe and this Mr. Spock was the promiscuous lady killer and not the captain. As his face came close to hers and paused for a split second, all she had time to wonder was if his lips were as soft as they looked.

As his mouth met hers, her thoughts melted away and she found herself swept up by his soft lips moving carefully against hers. His face was still very close to hers as he murmured, "I must leave." His breath had noticeably increased by then.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I didn't mean for this to-"

His fingers reached up and gently fluttered over her lips. She felt a burst his emotions from that action, too. _Adoration._ "Do not apologize, Nyota. I am unapologetic about what has happened between us. Are you truly sorry for this?" he asked as his eyes chained themselves to hers.

"No," she found herself saying boldly. Even if this never happened again, she would always cherish having had the feel of his touch just this once.

"I must go on duty, it is the only reason for my departure now," he said as he stood.

Before he could make it to the door, she found herself saying in a low tone of voice almost to herself, "What just happened here?"

Having heard her, of course, he felt obliged to turn and answer. "I do not know. But I do not think it would be wise for either of us to pretend it did not happen. Are we in agreement, Nyota?"

She only found herself nodding once in the affirmative.

"I see the uncertainty in your eyes," he said. "Come to me when it has passed. And then we may speak of this together." He didn't wait for her to answer, he simply left.

After that, she spent the day in deep thought. She had not seen this coming. He had told her to come to him when her uncertainty passed. And that day it had not. It almost had, by the next morning, though. And she decided after her shift on the bridge she would go to his quarters so they could figure things out.


	2. Chapter 2

"So what's wrong with Spock, Bones?" asked Jim Kirk. He was standing in McCoy's office while Spock was still in the medical bay on the diagnostic table in a healing trance.

"That last away mission, Jim, I warned you not to let Spock meld with that nut job," said McCoy as he shook his head.

"A little sensitivity could go a long way, Bones."

"Not when the mentally unstable person tries to kill you. And he was holding a knife to _my_ throat, not yours." Bones sighed as he sat down. "Jim, basically what's gone wrong is there was a tiny bit of an echo left on Spock's personality. That echo became somewhat of an inhibition blocker. He wound up doing and saying things he'd basically always wanted to do and say but ordinarily a cross between that logic filter and his personality would have prevented it. But due to the echo, some choice people happened to get a tiny peek into Spock's Id. I won't even tell you what he said to me."

"Was it exceptionally abusive, Bones?" smiled Kirk.

McCoy nodded. "That's what clued me in that something was slightly off about him. No, his words were not at all combative or confrontational toward me. He gave me an unsolicited compliment on my surgical skills that I could tell was heartfelt." He scratched his head and shrugged. "Fortunately he realized that something had gone wrong inside himself because _he_ came to _me_ and _asked_ for an exam this morning. I checked him, then I went back and cross checked… It seems that the race of people from that away mission doesn't have any true telepathic ability, but they do have the ability to alter the brain patterns of any telepaths they come into contact with. Ordinarily Spock wouldn't have been affected at all."

"But that mind meld..." Kirk felt distinctly guilty for a split second. It was not the first time he had ordered Spock to use his gifts to get the information their team needed to extricate themselves from a bad situation. It would also, he knew, not be the last time. But Spock knew the chances every time he engaged in a meld and he willingly took that chance in order to help his fellow crew members when it was needed.

"Had Spock not performed this self diagnostic, the echo would have grown over time and he would have simply degenerated into a being of pure feeling and impulse. We caught it so extremely early, before it was able to truly suppress his inhibitions, no one else even realized there _was_ anything wrong with him."

"Good job, Bones."

"That compliment is not really on me, Jim. Spock was the one who realized his logic was going awry. I give him all the credit for catching this one."

####

Uhura sat on the bridge that day wanting to fall through the floor. One thing about a starship was gossip traveled faster than light and now everyone knew that Mr. Spock had not been behaving as himself the day before because of some side-effect from his last away mission. The captain wanted everyone to report anything the first officer had done that seemed out of the ordinary. She had already decided she would keep what happened between the two of them private. There was no reason to report that the First Officer had attempted to initiate… whatever it was he had tried to initiate with her.

Then she was thinking that whatever had gone wrong, once Spock was back to normal he would most likely not even remember what he'd done. She huffed tiredly as she realized she had no proof for thinking that. She knew she was engaging in nothing more than wishful thinking. Once he returned to his normal self, even if he did remember what had happened, he might just as well go on with his life and not say another word to her. Right? She tried to breathe easy thinking about it that way, but that just made her feel worse.

She didn't want to pretend that nothing had happened, but she knew that might be the best course of action.

####

Spock sat in his quarters attempting to enter deep meditation. There had been fortunately very few reports of him acting out of the ordinary. The only downside was he could remember each shameful one. None had been detrimental to the health of himself or any others. All of the incidents reported had been seemingly innocent in nature.

From the foolish (commenting to Chekov that perhaps a language tutor could help him lose the accent), to the insulting (telling Lieutenant Bevins that blonde was definitely not her color), to the mundane (deciding to share his thoughts with Mr. Scott on the latest Miss Universe pageant). All of the incidents had been out of the ordinary for _him_. And while they had certainly not been disastrous or harmful (except for Bevins who had immediately gone and dyed her hair red), he had felt his lack of control in each circumstance and wondered why he could not stop himself from speaking and acting.

But there was one incident that had gone unreported and it was, tragically, the worse case of lack of self control he'd had while under the influence of the echo on his mind. That was the incident with Lieutenant Uhura. She had, for some untold reason, decided not to speak up about what had happened between them. He could not ascertain why the lieutenant would keep such a thing to herself.

Since meditation was eluding him that night, he took off his robes and sat on his bunk thinking about what had happened and pondered why the lieutenant had not reported it. Perhaps she thought it unimportant to report it? No, he could not see a woman as professional and efficient as the lieutenant failing to heed a direct order.

He thought about the things said and done between the two of them. And then he knew he must speak with her and clear the air.

####

Nyota jumped when her chime sounded. She wondered if maybe one of the junior communications officers happened to be stopping by with news on that subspace communication blip they'd all been keeping their ears alert for. But why would they stop by her quarters about it instead of just calling her on the intercom? "Come in," she said as she hung up her clothing. It always made her feel better to rearrange her closet.

When the first officer entered, she began to have that nervous feeling in her stomach all over again. But she had to remember, he had not been acting as himself when what happened had happened. So she should have no hard feelings, right? But some part of her did.

She put on the nicest smile she could and continued hanging her clothing in the closet. "Commander, what are you doing here this evening?"

He frowned. "Lieutenant, I do not think your memory is faulty in any way. Must I reiterate what passed between us while I was in my altered state?"

She sighed as she hung up the next to last garment. "I think that's the point, Commander. You weren't behaving as yourself so there's no need for you to come by and open this up."

He didn't understand why she was being so dismissive toward him. "You find no need to speak of this situation, no need for, as humans might describe it, 'closure'?"

"Well once I found out what was _really_ going on let's just say my mind had its own closure session," she admitted as she procrastinated putting the last outfit into the closet.

"Lieutenant, I am here because it has come to my attention that you did not report my behavior toward you during my compromised state. Is there some reason you have neglected to do so?"

"Well, sir," she said as she finally put that last outfit into the closet, "there's no reason to stand here and humiliate either one of us taking this out and reliving it. No harm, no foul. And more importantly, no embarrassing records for all at Command to see someday."

He realized then that she wouldn't turn around and look at him. She was also trying her best to keep her emotions to herself. He remembered what she had said to him before, about wishing she were the type who could hide her emotions better. She seemed to be doing an admirable job at that moment. He also remembered that she had told him, quite pointedly, that she didn't think he was capable of giving her what she needed. It had stung to hear it while he was in his altered state. Surprisingly, it stung to remember it now. Why would that bother him? Was he not cured? As far as he knew, he had been certified in full health and ready to leave sickbay after his healing trance.

"Does my presence cause your discomfort, Lieutenant?" he asked.

She exhaled once and then turned to face him. Her smile was back again. "I'm fine, sir. Really, I am… or at least, I'll _be_ fine."

He nodded only once. "I will depart then if there is nothing more to be said."

She nodded back at him once. As soon as he left, she sat down on her bunk and gave an exhale of misery paired with exhaustion. She was hoping the conversation wouldn't be too long. But she was also still feeling a tad humiliated. She hadn't lied to Spock. She honestly thought time would take care of that. And with the passage of time they would move back into their old roles of his being a superior officer and her being a subordinate. Balance would be reestablished. But still, it did hurt on some level.

As she touched her lips with the tips of her fingers, she couldn't help but remember the feel of his lips and fingers on hers. At least, she thought, she had the memory. It would have to be good enough.

####

Spock exited her quarters but something inside him was not at ease. He had never been the sort to lie to himself. And he had to admit that he was even more ill at ease than he had been before he'd entered her quarters. Something had gone wrong in their conversation and he could not detect what that something was. He had gone and cleared the air between them, had he not? She had indicated that she was more than fine, that there had been no need to make a record of the incident for both their sakes. So why was the situation, in his thoughts, not good enough?

And why could he not forget what she had told him while he was in his altered state, her very sure declaration that he could not give her what she needed?


	3. Chapter 3

About a week went by. Uhura regained most of her internal equilibrium. She was able to put her growing affection for the commander in its proper place. She refused to allow it to hamper her work on the bridge or change the way she behaved toward him. He, for his part, also seemed to have gone back to his regular logical self. She couldn't deny, though, that when she saw him enter a room, her knees went weak. And that kiss they'd shared followed her into her dreams from time to time. But she thought she was dealing with everything the best she could, given the circumstances.

To everyone else that had watched her descent into depression she seemed to be behaving as her old self. She felt like her old self, she just happened to have come back to herself with feelings for her superior that she couldn't shake. So long as no one read her mind, she surmised with a half laugh, she would be fine.

"I hear somebody's got a hot date this evening," Sulu commented over his shoulder. He was sitting at his station and as usual was the first one to start gossiping.

Nyota knew Hikaru was teasing her because she indeed did have a date that very night with Lieutenant Commander Mickelson. She had only agreed to go on it just so she could do something different with her evening for once, but she didn't know if she would term it 'a hot date'.

The captain wasn't on the bridge and Sulu was taking advantage, being mischievous. Mr. Spock turned, wondering whom Sulu was addressing with his words. Some part of his insides sank when Uhura responded with a playful smile, "Sulu, that's none of your business."

"It's not my fault if Mickelson feels the needs to brag about _his_ lieutenant," the helmsman continued in his teasing.

She grinned over at him as Chekov joined in the verbal fracas, "Everyone knows he has been seeking a date with the beautiful lieutenant from the bridge for months. And now that she's finally given in he has taken it upon himself to tell everyone who will listen that you will be marrying him and bearing his children within the year."

For the first time in weeks Uhura found herself laughing out loud until she was almost doubled over. "Don't believe everything you hear, boys!" she said when she was able to breathe again.

"It's time for the shift change," said Chekov.

Kevin Riley walked onto the bridge from the turbolift. "What are you doing here?" asked Sulu. "Shouldn't you be in engineering?"

"Thompson's sick. I was asked to do an extra shift for him. Boy am I glad to be here on the bridge right now," he said.

"What's that about?" asked Sulu.

"I don't know about you fellas," Riley answered as he took the navigator's seat Chekov surrendered to him, "but if I had to sit in that mess hall one minute longer and hear Mickelson brag about the date he's finally got with _his_ lieutenant, I swear I was ready to put my own eye out with a salad fork."

Chekov stopped at her chair on the way to the 'lift with a grin. "Lieutenant, take my adwice. Don't do anything I wouldn't do." She smiled up at him as he looked up thoughtfully and reflected on his own words for a few seconds. "But that would make you not a wery nice girl," he joked as he gave her one departing wink and then left the bridge.

Everyone laughed, except for the First Officer. The talk abruptly ceased as the captain entered the bridge from the 'lift.

Spock stood at his station, looking through his viewer. He appeared to be very busy, but only half of his mind was on his work. Apart of him was acutely uncomfortable with the thought of the lieutenant going out on a social date with Mickelson. He wondered why he should be experiencing such acute discomfort. He had still been unable to ascertain what his thoughts were concerning the woman who sat so very near him day after day. He had been watching her even more than usual out of the corner of his eye since the week before. There was a burn of dissatisfaction about something unidentified, and it was sitting in his lower regions. Had she so easily discarded thoughts of him and moved on?

He looked away from his viewer and turned to study the side of her finely formed face. She certainly seemed to have returned to her normal self. That she had resumed a social life was positive for her, he could see that. But that the object of her romantic attentions should so boldly declare, prematurely, that he would shackle the lieutenant to himself permanently and then fill her with his heirs… He certainly knew he would not do what his instincts were saying he should, because some ancient part of him was saying he should go and break Mickelson's neck and take Nyota for himself.

####

She was nervous. She thought she wanted to go on this date, but as the day grew longer and the time for it drew closer she realized she most certainly did not want to go on her date with Lieutenant Commander Graham Mickelson. For starters the man had a bigger mouth than she ever knew was possible for one of the male species. Did the whole ship now know they were going out that night? Whatever happened to discretion? She couldn't help but think that Mr. Spock would never do something so uncouth. But she had already given her word to Mickelson so she pushed herself along.

She went through what she called her 'date ritual'. She made sure to shave, clean, moisturize, dress, groom and scent herself as close to perfection as she could. Uhura left her quarters and went to meet the tall Lieutenant Commander at the correct place. The man she could see waiting for her from afar was about the same height as Spock. His hair was also just as dark as the Commander's and—

She wondered why she was thinking of this man in the same context as Spock? What would that accomplish? Nyota forced herself to greet the man standing in front of her and not the man occupying precious space in her mind. "Graham," she said as she shook his hand with a wide smile, "nice to see you this evening."

"And you, Nyota," he answered with an affectionate smile. She grimaced slightly. She hadn't liked the way he said her first name. Spock said it with this cute pronunciation that was… _oh STOP IT, NYOTA!_

The two took a seat and had an amicable evening of talking and even a little laughter. After a few minutes, they went to the mess hall and shared a meal together. Then they went to the ship's stores and pored over some of the materials there while eagerly discussing the literature section.

It was a nice enough date to her. No sparks, no fire, but a decent date. He was a perfect gentleman as he dropped her off at her quarters. He didn't even press her for a kiss. Not that his kiss could ever overshadow the one Spock had planted on her the week before and—

She wanted to kick herself. Just when she'd forgotten the commander—again—she'd compared him to the man standing in front of her.

"That was nice," he said as he was about to leave. "Maybe we can do this again?"

"Maybe," she said. She turned and entered her quarters.

She exhaled almost heavily with a release of pent-up nerves as her door shut behind her. It had been easier to get back into the social swing of things once she pushed herself, she had to acknowledge. She divested her feet of shoes and pulled off her date dress. She got into one of her very feminine nightgowns that just reached her knees and pulled out a tin of caramel popcorn she had left from her last stopover at a star base. She pulled out one of her favorite movies and put it on, a comedy. She needed some laughs. She curled up on her bed with the caramel popcorn and began to watch her movie.

####

Spock knew he was most likely not supposed to be there. But he needed to understand why he was dissatisfied with their relationship remaining at a purely professional mode with shadings of social interaction. As his hand hovered over the door chimer, he heard Nyota's lovely laughter from behind the other side.

Not even a second passed as the thought propelled through his mind that she was most likely in there with the lieutenant commander. A contained semi-state of rage filled him as his hand shot out and he leaned on the chimer intentionally.

"Come in!" she said and he did so, quickly.

He stood in the doorway and saw Nyota sitting in her bed in a state of half dress and his anger picked up an extra notch. "Have I interrupted you and the lieutenant commander?" asked Spock as he looked around for any sign of the man, his rage properly hidden.

She detected something was different about him as she shrugged, "No. He's probably in his quarters by now." She put down her tin of caramel popcorn and shut off the movie. Then she picked up on what was different about him. He was standing there just a little too rigidly. "Are you all right, Mr. Spock?"

"No," he admitted while looking at her.

"Oh," she said as her mouth formed a perfect 'O'. "Why don't you sit down. Is there something you needed to tell me?" she asked as she covered her tin of caramel corn and then stood to put it back into her closet.

He wouldn't take a seat. "I will not take up too much of your time, lieutenant. I only wished to ask you several questions." Since he was satisfied that Mickelson was nowhere around, his rage had decreased substantially.

She nodded at him as she stood in front of her bunk, very conscious of the fact that she wasn't dressed properly. "Well go on and ask."

He hesitated for only a split second. "You told me with seeming certainty last week that you did not think I was capable of giving you what you needed. What was meant by that?"

Uhura only found herself blinking back disbelief. "I-" She folded her arms. "Spock, did I hurt your feelings when I said that?"

He quickly answered, "My 'feelings' as you call them do not exist, therefore they cannot be injured. However I will admit to a certain level of offense at the implication of your words."

Her head cocked to the side. "Are you all right?" she asked as she walked directly up to him. "You aren't still suffering side effects from that virus or whatever it was, are you?" she asked worriedly.

"No, I am quite well, Nyota," he said. He could detect the perfume she'd applied that evening, probably for her 'date' with the unworthy Mickelson. The scent was pleasantly distracting to him.

She nodded as she noted the name change. "If you really want to know what I meant by what I said last week, I guess I could give it to you. But you might not like the answer you get."

"It is what I have asked for, is it not?"

She shrugged. "Well, Spock, you and I are—well, I need a certain level of touching and sensitivity and intimacy that might be difficult for you to fulfill," she said as she walked back to her bunk and sat down. "I can't believe I'm having this conversation. Why are we having this conversation now?" she asked as she looked up at him. It was getting on her nerves that he was still standing.

"Does Lieutenant Commander Mickelson fill this need for you?" he tried to ask impartially, but even as the words exited his mouth, the unmistakable feeling of fury began to unfurl inside him.

"Spock, it was only one date!" she found herself laughing.

"You kissed me quite eagerly last week, lieutenant, did you also kiss Mickelson this evening?"

She realized what it was standing in front of her at that moment. Jealousy. Good, old-fashioned jealousy. But this was even worse. "In your opinion should I not have gone on a date with Mickelson?"

"No, you should not have."

"And why not?" she asked as she stood, becoming angry.

"Because he wishes to marry and produce children with you. Is that what you wish for?"

"Well I'm at that point in my life where I'm going to want that with somebody."

"Mickelson is an illogical choice for a life partner, most assuredly where you are concerned," Spock shot back instantly. "That is why it was not logical for you to interact with him on such a close level socially."

She felt herself about to smirk. "And I suppose you're a better choice than he is?" She didn't expect what happened next.

He moved quickly and was suddenly standing in her space, looking down into her eyes. "Nyota," he almost whispered, "can you honestly say you have not thought of me once since last week? And can you at least concede that your bias to my outer disposition has led you to already discard me as a possible choice for your future?"

"Since when did you start thinking about my future this way?" she asked, more confused than ever.

"I was never under the impression that you were seeking a permanent partner. Now that I am aware of this need, I submit myself to you as the most logical choice you could make."

She nodded, filled with disbelief. "Oh, no no no. I'm not doing this to _my_self again," she said just as the familiar ache for him began to drift into her. She quickly backed away from him and in the process almost fell backward onto her bunk. Even as he instinctively reached out and caught her before she could fall, she was saying, "I want a doctor's report certifying that you are in your right mind before we speak about this any further, Spock."

He was still holding her in his arms from having caught her fall and nodded down at her once while his eyes clung to hers. "That is fair, Nyota," he said as he set her properly on her feet and then released her from his grasp. "I will return tomorrow with a clean bill of health. And then you and I will have the conversation we should have had last week." He turned to go and stopped as he admitted, "It was not logic that caused me to leave here without clarifying the state of things between us, before." And then he was gone.

She knew then she was going to have a hard time sleeping that night as she tried to control her breathing. Her heart was pounding and she realized she was shaking. The last time, with the kiss, it had seemed too good to be true. What was going on now?


	4. Chapter 4

She lay awake half the night, tossing and turning, her mind throwing questions at her she couldn't avoid. How hard was it going to be to date a Vulcan? When they had disagreements, would he simply tell her she was being illogical and dismiss her point of view? Did Vulcans date, anyway? Or did they just pop the question and expect you to fall in line instantly? And that was another issue. Would he always assume he knew best and be quasi-bossy toward her? There weren't very many Vulcan/Human relationships to draw a reference from and for the first time ever she wished she had his mother's personal comm frequency. She'd be inundating the woman with question after question if she did!

The galaxy was vast and things were changing every day, but it was still not overly common to date outside your species. She had a handful of friends from her Academy days that had married non-Humans. Two of them had been disowned by their families for doing so. And of the three friends leftover where things were fine to the Human families, one had not been great as far as the Andorian husband's family was concerned and they had temporarily disowned him along with vowing that if he ever set foot on the planet he would die a horrible death. Of course once the half Andorian dark-blue skinned baby showed up with those tiny antennae and baby coos, most of the blood vendettas were rescinded.

She had to decide, she knew, if she was ready to deal with that level of drama, not just from her family either, but from bystanders wherever they went, Human or Vulcan. Then she reminded herself that nothing had been confirmed, yet, because she hadn't gotten that clean bill of health she'd requested.

When she finally had slept, her dreams were overflowing with Spock. She wondered why the floodgates of Spock-mania were opening up now of all times, before she knew the results of his health report. She was supposed to be waiting until she knew he wasn't going insane first before allowing herself to want him this much! She felt like her subconscious mind was actively betraying her.

Nyota awoke that next morning and wondered what was going to happen next. She had barely slept and needed to get to the bridge. She was going to have to be artful with her make-up to hide the dark circles under her eyes.

####

Spock noticed the lieutenant's entrance onto the bridge that morning. He nodded once in greeting and then continued with his duties. He wondered if she had given any thought to the prospect of the two of them the night before. He certainly had.

Once the boundaries had come down in his mind he was able to enter meditation and many things he had previously ignored came to the fore. Nyota was a dependable woman, professional, efficient and an excellent friend. Simply from that one act of her withholding his indiscretion toward her while he had been compromised, it showed she would be willing to shield him from the prying eyes of others when his Time returned. She was discrete. It was a quality that many lacked, he'd noticed.

And then there had been the other aspects of the lieutenant he had forced himself, in the past, to ignore. Her lovely features, her clear smooth skin and most of all, her curvaceous well-formed body. In particular, he had caught himself on several occasions since her arrival on the _Enterprise_ unable to look away from her well formed backside as she passed his way. Many men aboard ship had been caught staring at that aspect of her anatomy on more than one occasion. He had not only ignored but forcefully put down his instinct to verbally call attention to the men he noticed had not simply glanced as she passed by, but had made a production of staring at her body lasciviously, men such as Lieutenant Commander Mickelson. As he stood at his duty station his jaw clenched as he remembered that she'd gone out with the lieutenant commander the day before. He hoped the man had been a gentleman and kept his hands to himself.

Spock found himself turning to look at the lieutenant several times throughout the day, allowing himself to survey the one he had decided should become his.

Nyota was not so busy at her station and found herself at one point gazing over at Spock, watching her. He didn't immediately turn away and continue his duties as he might have in the past. His eyes held hers and she felt a spark light inside her body. She turned away quickly and continued her duties, but she was unable to control the quickening of her pulse. What was he trying to do to her…on the bridge?

No one else was situated near them, so no one noticed the looks between the two. He was unabashed in the things his eyes conveyed. By the third stare, it was obvious to him that she was partial to the lingering way he looked at her.

She knew he was more than serious when she'd seen him sit down at his station from the corner of her eye and she'd turned to see him watching her again. He then slowly swept his eyes from the top of her hair, down her face, across her breasts and shoulders, then—all—the—way—down—her—figure, then back up to her eyes, topping it off with one raise of his eyebrow.

It was at that point she broke out in a sweat. Difficulties of interspecies romances be damned, she was going to give this a shot.

####

She returned to her quarters after her shift and after an hour found herself pacing back and forth. She didn't know how long it would take for him to get that report but—

Her chimer sounded. "Come in!" she said a little too quickly.

Spock walked in with a clipboard. She took it, looked it over and saw Leonard's signature at the bottom. So he was in his right mind, after all. Curiosity bubbled up inside. "What'd you say to get this from Leonard?"

"I simply told him I wished a confirmation of my sound mind for personal reasons. I was duly scanned, certified and sent on my way."

Nyota gave him the board back and then asked, "Would you like to sit down?"

He didn't answer. She expected him to either stand or sit in the one chair across the room from her bunk. But he went and sat down on her bed. She knew he didn't mean anything by it, but she found herself turning to hide a grin on her face. Did he realize what he'd just done?

She sat down near him, but turned so she was facing him head-on and found the same eyes that had been staring into hers on the bridge. "Shouldn't we be talking?" she finally asked after a few seconds.

"If that is what you wish," he said in an almost soft tone as his eyes caressed every point of her face.

She found herself holding back from giving in to a swooning sensation. Where in the hell had _that_ aspect of his voice come from? Where had he been hiding it? She then realized that was probably how he'd distracted the Romulan Commander in order to get the cloaking device stolen right from under her. He'd used_ that_ damn tone of voice on her, that's how! She cleared her throat then and launched in. "Exactly what did you have in mind for the two of us, Spock?"

"Did you not mention the want of a permanent commitment and possibly offspring in the near to far future?"

He got right to the chase, didn't he? "Yes, actually, I did." She nodded. One thing was certain, his Vulcan half was speaking now because no Human man she'd ever known had mentioned commitment this early on in a relationship.

"Perhaps since we are both working toward that common goal we may live our lives in sync until we are comfortable with undertaking that next step."

She found herself blinking. "Spock, before I can agree to that I need to know some things."

"I will endeavor to put your mind at ease at all times, Nyota. What is it you wish to know?"

"Why me?"

He seemed taken aback by that question. "Is there some reason you do not think yourself compatible with me?"

"No, I'm simply curious about the fact that with all of the females on this starship, in this galaxy, on your home planet, how is it I'm the female you've decided you might like to settle down with someday?"

He nodded. "Yes, you would like to know my logical reasoning as to why I think we are most compatible in comparison to any others."

She should have been upset at the way he'd put that, but some part of her thought it was disgustingly cute. "Okay, I'll take that for now."

"You are, in your way, logical. I find your determination, your professionalism and your efficiency highly admirable. You have proven, on more than one occasion, to be quite sensitive to the needs of others and in that way you would compliment my seeming appearance of insensitivity. I have also noticed you have grown, in your time aboard the _Enterprise_, to become a woman who is highly discreet in many ways. I have no wish to keep our relationship a secret, but I also do not think it is the concern of any others."

She nodded, surprised. "Those are very logical reasons for our compatibility, Spock."

He was still looking closely at her when he said, "There is one more reason I wish to share with you, Nyota."

She smiled at the way he said her name. "Tell me."

"It is not a logical reason, but it is there. And I find I must speak truthfully of it."

She reached out and gently touched his hand. He seemed to be troubled by what he wanted to say next. "You can tell me," she said, wondering if it was something negative.

"I find I must admit I wish to make you mine before any other can do so. It is not logical, but the thought of you belonging to another is highly unpleasant and therefore it cannot happen." His hand grasped hers and gave a slight squeeze as he said, "Put plainly, Nyota, I want you. There is no other way to say it."

Between the eyes that were intermittently looking into hers while sweeping up and down her facial features and his tone of voice that was so swoon-worthy, she didn't know how she was still sitting upright. She swallowed back a gasp. "I admit the thought of you with someone else isn't a nice one."

"I wished to inflict bodily harm upon Mickelson when I thought he was in your quarters with you. Also, when it reached my ears that he was referring to you as _his_ lieutenant…" Something dangerous sparked in his eyes and then it was gone.

She found herself laughing at his admission. Some part of her was terribly turned on by his words. "I _should_ be horrified but-"

"But you are not," he finished.

"But I'm not." She sighed as she realized that this was really happening. "Spock, if we're going to do this, you're not allowed to look at me like that on the bridge anymore."

He gave her the hottest eyes he could and then asked, "In what way do you mean, Nyota?"

"Those eyes you're giving me now," she said as she gave off a smiling blush. "I could hardly concentrate on my work today."

He had that effect upon her? He was more than pleased as he saw the color of her face deepen by degrees as he stared at her. "I will heed your words so that you may remain the efficient officer you are." Her look already told him that she was his. "Nyota," he suddenly whispered, "with your permission, I wish to touch you, briefly."

She'd definitely never heard _that_ tone of voice from him before. She felt her loins burst into flame as the whisper reached her ears. She took her hand from his and slid closer to him on her bunk. Being this close to his body was too much. She had the inexplicable instinct that he would overwhelm her in no time. He would consume her every thought, every action, permeate her down to the cellular level if they consummated things too quickly. She needed to clear that up immediately. "I need time to get used to us, Spock, before we become…intimate. Do you mind that?"

He nodded his head as his eyes relentlessly held hers. "I do not mind. In fact I agree that restraint in this circumstance is most assuredly necessary," he said even as his fingers reached up and began lightly brushing against the planes of her face, from her forehead to her cheekbones, then across her lips. "I will keep it only to touching," he assured her in a low tone.

Her eyes drifted shut at the feather light contact and she found herself smiling lightly. She opened her eyes and saw his face was so close to hers. She began to touch places on him she'd always been very curious about. She started at his eyebrows, traced the line of them with the pads of her fingertips. He closed his eyes as her fingers moved upward to brush along his hair. But as she moved the fingers of one hand over and trailed the delicate upswept curve of one ear, he inhaled sharply and found himself pulling her to him with both his arms.

One of his hands was cradling the back of her head and pulling her face to his. His mouth opened and covered hers on an exhaling groan and they were instantly entangled in a passionate kiss filled with her moans and both their sliding tongues. They were both on fire.

He abruptly let her go, stood and stepped away. Through sheer will, he was standing on his own two feet. "Nyota, please forgive me," he said. "I should have warned you, my ears are very…sensitive."

She was out of breath and shaking. _Who feels this way after one kiss?_ Yes, she knew then that it would most certainly overwhelm her if they entered a physical relationship too soon. She wasn't ready for that, she knew it. But it didn't stop her from wanting it.

"I do not yet wish to leave your company, Nyota," he admitted as his fevered eyes returned to looking into hers. "Perhaps we may go to the mess hall together and share a meal."

She looked up at him and smiled. "I'd like that."


	5. Chapter 5

_A/N: I admit, this was going to be my last chapter, but I'm having too much fun with this story to end it now. So this will NOT be the last chapter._

Their shared meal in the mess hall was not seen as strange to anyone else. It wasn't uncommon, on some days, for entire portions of the bridge crew to share a meal. And since the two were bridge officers, everyone assumed they were simply kibitzing over some situation where their two departments had to work together.

After their meal, they walked the corridors of the ship together until they reached the observation lounge. Uhura smiled. This was where she had met Mickelson for their date. "I spent the entire date comparing him to you," she admitted out of nowhere.

"Indeed?" asked Spock with the raise of one eyebrow. He knew exactly to whom she was referring.

She nodded. "It wasn't fair to him, but I did. It wasn't at all intentional. I just couldn't help it."

Something inside him soared. No one else was around at that time and he found himself standing just a little bit closer to her. "Perhaps now would be the proper time to define the boundaries of things."

She smiled. "So we don't rip each others clothes off by accident?" she joked.

"Amongst other things," he admitted.

She found herself laughing. "That's fair. All right. Is there anything else I should know about you not to touch so, you know, we don't wind up in the position we almost wound up in in my quarters?"

He unconsciously placed his hands behind his back so that he didn't give in to the instinct telling him to pull her close to him right then and there. "My ears, certainly, as you now know. My hands are very sensitive since I am a touch telepath."

She frowned, "I didn't know that. I'm sorry. I'll be careful touching your hands from now on."

He looked down at her and said in an offhand way, "You do not have to be careful touching my hands, Nyota. You are mine. Simply be careful of your thoughts when you do touch them. There is but so much stimulus I can take without giving in to temptation."

She almost swayed and hit the floor when she heard him say so very casually that she was his. She was able to pretend it was the most normal thing in the world to hear, but she had to admit it was sexy as hell and wondered if that was a Vulcan thing. "And is that all?" she asked.

"No," he admitted as he looked away. "Do not ever bite me unless you wish to initiate something deeper."

It was the third time that day she found herself breaking out into a sweat. "Bite you?"

"It is a thing of instinct leftover from the past. It is a way of marking ones mate. And if you do bite me wishing to instigate something more between us, do it properly. Bite down as hard as you can. Draw blood. Mark me as unmistakably yours."

She found herself looking away from him. She was turned on and terrified all at once. "Wouldn't that hurt?"

"Yes," he said. Then his hand reached out and turned her chin to look back up at him. "But when you are also telepathically connected to the giver, it is a source of indescribable pleasure," he said as his eyes devoured hers. "And pain contains its own pleasure at times." He dropped his hand then, conscious that though no one else was around, anyone could arrive at any moment since it was still a public space.

She looked away again. They were supposed to be having this conversation about what not to do to land them in bed too early, and it was making her want to land in bed too early. "Are there any _other_ Vulcan things I should know about beforehand?"

"If you initiate something deeper and we engage in sexual congress, it increases the chance each time that I will not be able to contain my need to link with you permanently."

"As in?"

"As in a permanent bond of marriage between the two of us."

Her eyebrows rose. "I'm glad you warned me about that ahead of time," she said. Getting involved with him, it appeared, was serious stuff!

"And lastly, there is one other factor we must discuss."

She found herself smiling up at him. "There's more?"

He was pleased she was amused and not ready to flee from him during this conversation. She was, indeed, a mentally strong woman. "It is built within my DNA to guard my mate beyond reason at times."

"You mean that jealousy thing."

"How are you aware of that instinct?" he asked, amazed at her powers of observation.

"Look at the way you were about Mickelson. Speak of the devil," she said as she looked past Spock.

Lieutenant Commander Mickelson was approaching them. "What are you doing here, Nyota?" he asked her.

Spock did not like the way this male was looking at her. But he maintained his calm. "We are discussing very important matters," he answered for her.

She found herself about to laugh out loud, but contained it. "What's going on, Graham?"

"I was just taking a shortcut to stellar cartography," he said. "I saw you and figured I'd ask while I had the chance, when are we going on another date?"

Uhura's mouth couldn't even form a coherent sentence. It just dropped open in a state of near-shock.

"It is a breach of etiquette to ask a female such a question while she is currently engaged in a conversation with another male," said Spock.

"I'm sorry," he said with a light smile. "I don't mean to bust up your conversation on ship's business. I'll call you later, Ny," he said. But as he looked at Spock to bid him good-bye, he was met by the eyes of a rival. "O-KAY," he said instead of saying farewell. But he left them behind that much faster.

"Your restraint was admirable," she found herself saying as she smiled up at him.

Since they were alone again, he found himself reaching out with one hand quickly and brushing his thumb across her cheek in a lingering caress. He returned his hand behind his back again and looked out at the stars. "I can tell you the position of our ship in the cosmos based solely on which star we happen to be closest to. I can tell you how long it would take to get there, down to the last millisecond with and without warp drive. But this evening, would it satisfy you for the two of us to simply stand and watch the stars?"

Never had she wanted to reach out and touch someone more than she did at that moment. But she restrained herself. "That sounds lovely," she admitted.

"Then we shall do so," he said.

"Spock?"

He looked down at her sparkling eyes. "Yes, Nyota?" he answered softly.

"I'm happy to be here with you now."

His eyes surveyed the observation deck to make certain no one was about, then his lips quickly brushed against hers. "It is an honor to be yours, Nyota."

She turned back to look at the stars. She knew she was in deep trouble. She was already in love with him.

####

Spock came out of his meditation sequence the next morning. He had received adequate sleep the night before since he and Nyota had not spent too long walking the ship.

There was an inexplicable sensation in his midsection, a crushing force within him that was simultaneously filled with possession and want. His want for her was growing not by days, but by hours. He knew he would have to engage his personal checks and balances more stringently when he was around her. She was wise to stipulate that they should not engage in anything physical until she was able to handle it. He, too, knew that if they did so too soon, he would become someone unlikable from his sheer possessiveness that he knew he must get under control before he allowed himself to touch her in that way.

Already his mind yearned to touch hers, hands begged for the honor of serving her needs in every way possible. But he could most assuredly wait until she was ready. If he wished to keep her permanently, he would have to wait.

His intercom whistled and he snapped it open, "Spock here," he said.

There was a brief pause. "Did you sleep well?" asked the voice of the woman who was already filling his mind.

His eyes closed as he said, "Yes, Nyota. I had a productive rest cycle."

She chuckled. "I did _not_."

He asked, concerned, "Is there some reason you did not obtain adequate rest?"

He could hear her pleasant light laugh over the intercom. "Anytime I start to think too much I have trouble sleeping."

"Why has your thought process has gone into overdrive?"

"You, mister," she teased.

"Is there something about myself that has caused this?"

She paused for a few seconds and then, "I can't stop thinking about you," tumbled from her lips.

His body relaxed and his face formed a slight half smile. "Nor I, you," he admitted.

"I don't know what I'm going to do," she admitted.

He grew serious as he sat forward in his chair. "Say you are mine," he whispered.

"Hell yes, I'm yours," she admitted.

His insides were clamoring for her. "Nyota, perhaps we should rethink the decision to not join our bodies until a future time."

She actually laughed out loud. "I'll see you on the bridge, Commander!" and the connection snapped shut.

####

Days passed into weeks. Several situations brewed in the meantime. They all came to a head at once.

Uhura was on the bridge with a pounding headache. There was just too much stress going on in her life. For starters, the communications anomaly turned out to be secret communiqués being passed by some agent of some bureau. No one knew what agent or what bureau. Federation, Klingon, Romulan, Orion Syndicate? No one knew. All they could do was continually monitor it and submit the reports to Starfleet. Anytime of day or night, when they received the data since she was chief of communications she had to personally go down to the bowels of the ship and take a look at it, pinpoint the source and verify it. Then she had to go through about an hour of electronic paperwork, signing, initialing and then two to three hours of encryption before sending it out to Starfleet.

She had to continually change her encryption process to minimize the chances of the messages being intercepted and decoded. To change her encryption process entailed four hours of work. She usually had several forms on hand for a back-up, but all forms had been used up as of three weeks before. She felt as if she were flying by the seat of her pants at that point. It was the longest she had ever had been on continual standby.

Spock had shifted from not only being an avid pursuer, but also a constant comfort for her. Anytime of day or night whenever he knew she had been called down to go through another process, he would be there in her quarters waiting when she returned.

They had had another such night the day before and he had relaxed her into sleep by first thoroughly massaging her back until the tension was gone from her shoulders. He then took his fingers, put them to her psi-points and whispered, "Sleep."

Honestly, it was the best night of sleep she'd had in days. She would do a regular shift on the bridge and two to three times a week she was called up anywhere from 3 p.m. to 3 a.m. to go down to the bowels of the ship and take care of business.

She could see it in Spock's eyes. He was very concerned about her. Initially it didn't bother her at all. But after a week and a half, the continual break in her sleep cycle began to take a toll on her.

The captain had commended her on more than one occasion because of her dedication to her duty and she had nodded and thanked him like a good Starfleet officer. But when sleep gets interrupted that often no amount of thanks made that sleep loss feel better. She wished whoever was pursuing the agent and their information would just get it done already so she could get some real sleep over several days.

"Life treating you badly, lieutenant?" asked Sulu.

She smiled. "Just sleepy."

"Is it from being hounded by Mickelson?" he asked, "That guy is out of his mind."

Mr. Scott was on the bridge that day. "Aye, the lad has been talking about the lack of the company of_ his_ lieutenant. Of course it didn't help that Riley made things worse, reminding him about his oath to marry the lieutenant and saddle her with his bairns."

"Oh, Kevin didn't, did he?" asked Uhura, horrified.

"Aye, he did," said Scott. "The lad told him, straight out, that he didn't have an ice cream cone's chance in Klingon Hell to be with you. Serves the man right, too. Never bet on something that isn't sure, is what I say."

"Well I say never bet," Uhura threw out.

"What is it you don't like about the lieutenant commander?" asked Chekov.

"He's just a tad creepy," Sulu answered for her. "He's one of those guys that thinks he can make some woman love him by sheer persistence alone."

It was true, Nyota thought. The lieutenant commander had become somewhat of a persistent shadow.

"Are you being harassed, lieutenant?" came Spock's voice, then, from across the bridge. She had kept all of this from him because she knew he would not at all be happy about this development.

She turned to look at him. She knew that look on his face, even if no one else did. They'd only been together for a month, but that look said he was about to kick someone's ass. She groaned. "Ah, sir," she protested, "I don't want to-"

"We will speak about this after your duty shift, lieutenant," said Spock.

"About time someone took care of that nuisance," said Montgomery Scott. "I don't know how you dealt with it this long, lieutenant."

She didn't get a chance to answer because then the captain walked off of the turbolift. "Captain on the bridge," announced Mr. Spock.

Everyone's mouths snapped shut and the rest of the shift went on, albeit very uncomfortably for Uhura. She wondered what was going to happen _now_.


	6. Chapter 6

Their shift was done at the same time. He walked up to her station to retrieve her. "If you would accompany me to my quarters, lieutenant, so that we may attend to this situation," said Spock.

She protested, "Sir, it really isn't necessary to-"

"I will be the one to ascertain that," he said as he inclined his hand in the direction of the turbolift.

She sighed, handed her station over to one of the waiting junior communications officers and then accompanied Mr. Spock into the turbolift. The lift doors closed and she looked over at him, but he wasn't looking at her. She could see his jaw clenching. He was controlling his anger…barely. That couldn't be good. They exited the turbolift and walked to his door.

As soon as they entered his quarters and the door shut behind them, his hands grabbed her by the hips, pulling her in close to him. "Why did you not tell me?" were the first words out of his mouth. His eyes were holding onto hers, searching for the truth.

His hands were practically welded to the sides of her hips and her heart rate had gone up substantially. He had never touched her like this. The touch said 'this is my woman'. That she didn't struggle against it showed her agreement. "I didn't think it was a big deal," she said with a little shrug.

His eyebrow rose. "You are aware, lieutenant, that it is against regulations to pursue a relationship with someone who has made it quite clear they are not interested."

She rolled her eyes. "Spock, since when do people listen to all of the regulations?" she asked as she put both arms up and around his shoulders. Her hands began to rub at the base of his neck.

Enjoying her touch, he leaned back into it. "Have you spoken with the lieutenant commander since that night some weeks ago when he came upon the two of us in the observation lounge?"

"Yes," she admitted. She could see the fire of jealousy in his eyes and couldn't help but to grin at it.

"You will, of course, tell me what happened."

She rolled her eyes at him again since she could tell it was not a request. He waited for the tale.

####

As promised, Graham called her the next day and inquired as to the next time they could go out on a date. "Graham, I don't think it's fair to drag this out," she said to him. "But we don't have any chemistry."

"So that means?" he asked.

"That means it wouldn't be fair to either one of us to go out on anymore dates."

He at first just sat there and didn't say anything else. She could see him on the other side of the screen looking contemplative. "Was it something I did or said?"

"Oh, no! You're a great person. We just aren't compatible, that's all."

"Well I don't agree," he said. Then he snapped the connection shut.

At first she didn't see or hear from him after that for about two weeks and she thought that was the end of it. Just when the crazy sleep patterns began to affect her health and mood, she started getting love letters from him. They were not her style. The first time she got a letter she was going on 24 hours with no sleep due to back-to-back shifts on the bridge and down in the communications lab. She decided she would talk to him after she'd gotten some sleep. Upon awakening, she went straight back onto a bridge shift, got back to her quarters and there was a second letter from him, waiting at her door.

She was standing there half dead on her feet, pissed off. Though exhausted, that second letter was the proverbial straw. She took both letters and made sure to go to the mess hall since she knew that was when he would be there.

He was there all right, talking to several crew members when she entered. He saw her and jumped up, ran to her side. "Nyota, it's great to see you. Did you get my letters?" he asked.

She made certain to walk with him way over to the side of the room so their conversation couldn't be overheard. Even though she was pissed off she felt no need to humiliate the man. Still, she felt distinctly uncomfortable as she handed the two letters back to him. "Here they are."

"Why are you giving them back?" he asked, confused.

"Graham, I think you and I need to have a more candid conversation this time," she said, taking the bull by both horns.

"What, you didn't like them?" he joked.

"Can you not send me anymore letters?" she asked as nicely as she could.

"Love letters not your thing?" he asked.

"Well I admit I _do_ feel uncomfortable getting them from you when you and I are not together."

"So then let's _get_ together," he smiled.

"I already told you I don't want to, Graham."

"But we went out on a date."

"Yes, I know we did. One date. And that was over two _weeks_ ago and I already told you I'm not interested in going on anymore dates since we were not at all compatible to become a couple."

He seemed taken aback. "We're perfect together," he said with conviction. "You and I talked so much, meshed so well. I don't think you realize what you're passing up!"

She sighed. "We'd certainly make great _friends._"

"Is there someone else?" he asked.

She was glad she'd picked the mess hall for this conversation. "Yes," she came out and said. "But that doesn't have anything to do with this. Now listen, you're a great guy. And any woman suited for you would be happy to be with you, but I'm not suited for you."

He nodded. "I see how it is. Well let me tell you something. You don't realize that you and I, we can be so _much_ together. And I won't leave you alone. You'll realize, soon, that I'm just what you need. And by the way, I don't believe you about there being some other guy. I haven't even seen you with anyone else since we went out!"

Now _she_ was angry. "Look here, mister, I'm not going to stand here and get told what's good for _me_. I'm also not going to stand here and have you or anybody else tell _me_ I'm a liar," she said. "But get the message. I am not interested in a relationship with you. And don't send me another letter because despite the vacuum of space I _will_ find a way to burn it without even having read it, is that clear enough for you?"

"Is that how you address a superior officer?" he asked angrily.

She couldn't believe he was flipping the script on her like this. "What?" she snapped. And she just walked out on him, angry as hell.

After that, the lieutenant commander had gone away for a time to lick his wounds. But then a week before he had begun practically hounding her anytime she stepped out of her quarters. Once, while she was in the bowels of the ship during the wee hours of the morning he had appeared in the communications lab and simply stared while she worked for a few minutes, then he'd disappeared. She'd wanted to call Spock to pick her up, but some part of her didn't want to think she couldn't walk the corridors of her own ship at night without being accosted. He was, fortunately, nowhere to be seen as she made her way back to her quarters that night.

Then he had begun the trash talking behind her back, mentioning how the lieutenant would be his soon, she just didn't know it. He had also said whoever the lieutenant was _supposedly_ involved with wasn't doing right by her. He said that someone needed to burn the attitude off of her big frozen backside. (That was the comment that had so angered Kevin Riley.)

The last conversation between the two of them had happened the day before when she was on her way out of the ship's stores. She had just finished encrypting and sending the last communiqué and needed to pick something up for herself she'd been unable to for sometime. She wanted to get back to her quarters to see Spock, that instant, but here was Mickelson up in her face again.

"What are you doing here?" he asked with a smile and a sparkle in his eyes.

She rolled hers. "Just taking care of personal business, sir," she said, sure to add the 'sir' so he knew she was addressing him as an officer and nothing more.

"Nyota, why don't you let me take you out again? It isn't fair to not let a man change your mind, you know."

"I already told you, I'm with someone else."

"You're still with whoever?" he asked as he waved the information off. "This imaginary man can't be doing his job right. You look stressed out. If you were with me, you would never be stressed out, I can promise you that. I'd take care of that real good," he said suggestively as his eyes swept up and down her body.

"Whatever. I have to go now, sir," she said as she began to walk away.

"I didn't give you permission to go, yet, lieutenant," he said as he attempted to pull rank.

"I'll tell you what," she said through her exhaustion. "I'll walk away now, you put me up on charges of insubordination, and we can have a hearing about it, all right? Okay, thanks. Bye, sir." And then she was gone.

####

Spock's hands were no longer on her hips and her hands were no longer up around his shoulders. They were standing properly away from one another as he digested the tale. "This lieutenant commander has attempted to use rank to force you to continue speaking with him on more than one occasion," said the Vulcan. Males like this one, he realized, would use rank to get a subordinate female officer to do more than simply speak with them. There was unchecked fury swimming through Spock at that moment.

She saw the transformation happening right before her. He hadn't been kidding about his protective side being overly zealous. But she supposed she couldn't fully blame him. If their roles were reversed she would also be mad as hell. She had a feeling she was going to have to talk him down before he did something they would both regret later. She walked up to him and put her arms around his waist. "Spock, this is why I didn't tell you," she whispered up at him, her chin resting on his lower chest region. "And I admit I've been so tired with all the late night calls down to the lab I've been pushing the situation to the back of my mind until I had the energy to deal with it."

He found himself looking down into her face, drawn in by the softness of her voice. "You do not wish for me to speak to the lieutenant commander?"

"That's my job, Spock."

"You have done so repeatedly and he has not heeded your words."

"If you did, what would you say? In what capacity would you be speaking to him? As both our superior officer mediating a dispute or as-"

"As the male who wishes for another male to cease pursuing his mate."

She was instantly turned on but also uncomfortable about the situation as she turned her head and put the side of her face to his chest. She hugged him tight and inhaled deeply.

His hands encircled her as he said, "Nyota, something must be done about this. You are aware of that, are you not?"

She swallowed back anxiety as she put her face straight into his chest. "Yes," came her muffled answer. "This is just damned embarrassing."

He was very affected by her discomfort over the situation. "You have informed him on more than one occasion that you are by no means interested in being his. Perhaps there is a way he may be dissuaded from you."

"It gets on my nerves to have him still coming back for punishment. Nothing is possible between him and me because I'm already in love with-" she stopped speaking. She couldn't believe she'd let that drop so soon! Her eyes widened as she was still snuggled up to his chest. The tiredness was really getting to her.

An emotion seized his entire body and he held her back from him so he could look into her eyes. "Are you truly, Nyota?" he whispered with wonder.

She was even more nervous as she swallowed and nodded in the affirmative. "Yes."

"Tell it to me," he said as he looked into her eyes.

"I'm in love with you," she whispered as she looked up into his eyes.

"K'hat'n'dlawa, ashayam," he responded almost breathlessly as his fingers began to touch her face.

This touching was different from any others before it. She could feel his emotions coursing through her with every light touch of his fingertips. She was being enveloped by the intensity of his emotions and she liked it. She pulled his face down to hers and initiated a deep kiss that he more than accepted as his arms encircled her hips. He lifted her off the ground then as he held her as close to him as he could. Breath and feeling passed between them as they both began to soften in each others arms. Something was about to happen that neither of them were ready for. Biology was about to take over. Fortunately, his chimer rang.

They both quickly stepped back from one another. Uhura turned her back to the door to get herself under control. Spock faced his door, already composed in less than two seconds, and said in his normal tone of voice, "Come."

Captain Kirk entered just then. "Oh, good, Uhura, you're here too. I've heard from Mr. Scott there's a case of harassment going on involving you. He said that Spock ordered you here to speak about it after you both went off duty, so let's all talk about it."

"The lieutenant does not wish to press charges," said Spock.

Why wasn't Uhura speaking for herself? Something was odd there and Jim could sense it. "Uhura, is that the case?" he asked.

She turned and looked at him, her composure back in place. "No, sir, I don't want to press charges. I figure with time Mickelson will just go away. It isn't the first time I've gone through this, after all."

"Despite that, lieutenant, either myself or Mr. Spock will have a talk with him, if you don't mind," said Kirk. "You don't have to press charges, but we can give him a verbal reprimand first and see what happens after that. I can't have my bridge officers too stressed. Especially when they're in the middle of important work for the Federation," he said.

She nodded as she looked at them both. "Am I done here?"

"You may go," said Spock, not attempting to hide how he spoke with her. "I will come and speak with you later. In the meantime you must rest."

She knew he would certainly catch up with her later if that's what he said. She gave him one last small smile and then left his quarters for hers.

As soon as she was gone, Kirk looked at Spock. "Spock, I've known you for quite sometime."

He nodded. "Yes, Jim."

"I may be a busy man not able to catch everything going on on my ship, but at least you could have warned me, Spock."

"About?"

"You and the lieutenant."

He should have known the man who was the best friend he'd ever had would have picked up on the subtle nuances between himself and his woman. "Jim, I did not wish to have the eyes of the crew on us so soon. We wished first to establish a strong base for our relationship."

Kirk couldn't blame him for feeling that way. "Who else knows, Spock?"

"No one," he said.

"And how long has this been going on?"

"Approximately one month. If you would like the exact amount of time, it has been-"

"That's all right, Spock. I get the picture." The captain sighed. "My lips are sealed. You know I won't say a word to anyone. Whenever you decide to air this to the crew is between you two."

He looked at his friend. "I thank you for your discretion, Captain."

"So while we're on the subject, do you think you can manage to speak with Mickelson without breaking his neck?" asked the Captain.

Spock frowned as he said truthfully, "I do not know, sir."

"Then maybe we'd both better do it. First chance tomorrow."


	7. Chapter 7

As he left Spock's quarters Kirk just didn't feel right about the situation. Uhura, he knew, had been under a lot of stress lately. He also knew the lieutenant hadn't been sleeping well and sometimes not at all. The biggest chunk of sleep deprivation he knew the lieutenant had undergone over the past month was nearly 72 hours. Given the circumstances he saw exactly why the communications officer couldn't think straight enough to want to tackle a case of sexual harassment.

He decided to do a little checking of his own and went straight to sickbay. As he walked in, he saw that McCoy and Chapel were both there.

"Hello, Captain," said Chapel in greeting.

"Nurse, how are you today?"

"Fine. Is something wrong?" she asked.

"Yes and no," he said to the nurse. Then he turned to McCoy. "Bones, can I speak to you in confidence?"

"Sure, Jim. Step into my office."

The two walked over to the side and waited until the door closed. "What's wrong, Jim? Your salt intake affecting your performance with the ladies?"

The captain was not amused. "This is serious, Bones. I need to know if Lieutenant Commander Mickelson has had a psyche evaluation lately."

"What's going on, Jim?"

"I'm surprised you haven't heard by now. It's practically all over the ship. The lieutenant commander can't seem to get it out of his mind that our own Lieutenant Uhura is supposed to be with him. It doesn't matter how often she's let him know she isn't interested."

"Tell her to put him up on charges, then, Jim," said McCoy. "Has that bastard put his hands on Uhura?"

The captain nodded. "If that were the case, Bones, this matter would already be settled. No, he hasn't touched her as far as I know. And as for her putting him up on charges, I suspect the lieutenant is so overwhelmed by this situation with the communications lab and the lack of sleep, she isn't thinking too straight. But I have my own suspicions. Can his latest psyche eval be pulled or not?"

"Fortunately those sorts of things are for commanding officer's eyes only, so you're in luck, Jim. I'll send it to you by this evening."

"Thanks, Bones," said the captain as he began to depart.

"Where you going now?"

"Records division. I'm working on a hunch."

"What hunch?"

"When he was assigned to the enterprise the lieutenant commander didn't have anything like this in his personnel record. But there are other things to look for besides direct charges. I'd like to know how many women have transferred out of the lieutenant commander's department, here and his last assignment."

"Why don't you get Spock to help while you're at it?"

"I'd like to keep this investigation as confidential as possible," said Kirk.

"He gets on my damn nerves, but we both know that if you're conducting an investigation, Jim, Spock is the best you've got."

James Kirk felt like he was standing between the proverbial rock and an uncomfortable hard place as he scratched his head thoughtfully. One thing he didn't want to do was betray Spock's confidence. "He's a member of the bridge crew, McCoy. And most of the bridge crew and some of engineering, including Scotty, would like to rearrange Mickelson's face over this."

"Especially for that reason you won't get anyone as impartial as Spock, Jim."

"Not this time, Bones. I'm going this one alone. I have my reasons."

McCoy only frowned as he watched the Captain leave. "What the hell was that about?" he asked aloud.

####

Uhura was in a sound sleep that night when she received another communiqué alert. "Lieutenant Uhura to the Communications Lab," Junior Communications Officer Ensign Jamal Enriquez said over the intercom.

She struggled up to the surface of consciousness and looked at her clock. Her bleary eyes read what it said. 0128 hours. She hit her intercom, "On my way, Ensign."

"Enriquez out," he signed off.

She dragged herself out of bed and into her bathroom to get herself together as quickly as possible. She knew Spock had most likely already been alerted and was warmed that he would be in her quarters waiting for her after she was done. Since she had already worked out a new encryption code, at the most she would be in the lab four hours. She might be able to snatch over two hours of rest before having to get up, get ready and report to the bridge.

After getting herself out of her quarters she made her way to the bowels of the ship and walked into the lab to see Enrique on his way out. "The work is already there, ma'am," he pointed as he left. He paused, "Oh, and Mr. Spock is also on his way down."

"Spock?" she said, truly surprised.

"I don't know why either, but he said he is."

Enrique left and Uhura began her tedious work of checking the transmission over and pinpointing the origin. By the time she'd worked that out, the door opened and shut and she could hear the unmistakable sound of Spock's footsteps coming toward her. She turned to see him and smiled widely.

"You appear quite tired, Nyota," he said with concern.

"I am," she admitted as she began to pull out the log books and sign off on page after page of reports about this latest communiqué.

She noticed he sat down in the only available chair and then she felt his hands pulling her into his lap. "Sit lieutenant. Surely it will be overly taxing to stand throughout your entire shift."

She smiled and leaned back against him as she spared him a quick kiss on the lips before she leaned all the way forward to the desk to begin working again. He had a data PADD and began scrolling through it to organize his own project. Soon the two were working in companionable silence.

They heard the door of the lab open and shut and both looked up. Lieutenant Commander Mickelson was there, staring at the two of them. They just sat there with data PADDs in their hands, blinking back at him. The couple then remembered the position they were in.

Mickelson seemed to be in a state of shock as it registered in his mind that the woman he'd been pursuing, dreaming of day and night for months, wanting with every fiber of his being, was sitting in the lap of the Vulcan first officer of his ship. He didn't even say a word. His face colored over as his lips pressed into a thin line and he turned and walked back out of the room.

The two still in the lab said nothing at first. Uhura then found herself bursting into laughter after a full minute of stunned silence passed. She was practically crying, she was laughing so hard.

"Nyota, what is so humorous about this situation?" he asked as he put down his PADD.

"Ahhh!" she almost screamed laughing. "Oh, Spock, the look on his face as he connected the dots…he realized that when he walked up on us in the observation deck he'd actually interrupted us on a _date_." She positively couldn't breathe by that point. "Oh," she nearly panted, "this is just too much. I've been under way too much stress and not getting nearly enough sleep. Anytime that happens, it causes me to have terrible laughing fits sometimes. I'm sorry." She took a deep breath and forced herself to calm down.

He pulled Nyota closer to him with both arms. "When do you estimate you will be finished with your task?"

"About an hour," she said as she rubbed at her aching neck.

His fingers began to knead the muscles of her neck and back while she groaned in relief. "I will stay with you until then," he said as he continued to rub.

She turned back to her task and finished it up a little over an hour later. She then stood and began the process of sending it through her already prepared encryption codes. She then sent it on to Starfleet. By the time she was done, it was already 0630. "I have to be on the bridge in two and a half hours," she almost wailed.

The morning shift in the lab was due any minute. "You may at least obtain a small amount of rest before then," said Spock. "I will accompany you to your quarters."


	8. Chapter 8

By the time they got back to her quarters, Uhura was drop-dead tired. Neither one had yet broached discussing the ramifications of what Mickelson had walked in on until she stated out of nowhere, "Well all things considered, Spock, it could have been worse."

"Worse?" he asked as he watched her gathering toiletries for her shower. It was strangely warming to him that he knew exactly to what she was referring.

"Yes, worse," she said as she turned to face him. "He could have walked in on me bent over a console- and you bent over _me_." Her grin was teasing. It said _top that_.

There was a half smile playing at one side of his lips as he rose to the challenge of besting her words. "Nyota, I was not aware you also had that thought cross your mind upon occasion."

Once again, she found herself laughing until it hurt. She gave him a quick kiss on the lips and then made her way to her shower. Afterward, Uhura settled into bed. She was hoping to obtain two hours of sleep before having to get up and get ready to go to the bridge. Spock was there, sitting up with another data PADD while she lay next to him. "You don't have to stay with me now, Spock," she said as she felt her eyes growing heavy. "Not if you don't want to."

"I wish to remain by your side," he admitted. "Do not begrudge me that pleasure."

"Of course I won't," she said as she turned onto her side. Her eyes closed and that fast she was already asleep.

He found himself watching her closely. She had dropped into a heavy sleep quite quickly and for that he was more than concerned. She was being overworked and as a result she wasn't receiving adequate rest. He knew she would not want him to, but he was seriously contemplating speaking to the captain about it later. The situation with the undercover agent was lasting much too long and Uhura's body couldn't take much more sleep deprivation.

Her fatigue, he knew, was a protection in itself. Because he was so concerned for her health he had been better able to handle the two of them being unable to consummate their relationship. But once that obstacle was put aside he would have to begin deeper meditation techniques to exercise better mastery over his body. He would remain in control, no matter the cost. She must be ready for that step to take place, he continually told himself. He would not be instrumental in swaying her into anything too soon. Once already he had come too close to the edge with her. He could not allow that to happen again.

####

Later on that day, right after their duty shifts on the bridge were over, Uhura went to her quarters to grab a much needed nap while Spock went to the Captain's quarters. He noticed that the captain had been almost moody and contemplative the entire day. By the time he entered his quarters, the captain looked downright depressed.

"Jim, what has happened?"

He was sitting at his desk, face thoughtful. "I just got finished looking into the records to try and determine something on my own. Spock, Uhura's got to press those charges."

"She is quite adamant that she does not wish to, Jim."

"Maybe if she knows what I've found, she'll do it."

"You have uncovered something in your unofficial investigation?"

"I have."

He knew whatever the captain had come across couldn't be good. "Will you share your findings with me?"

"Certainly," he said as he stood and gave Spock everything he'd compiled. "Apparently our own Lieutenant Commander Mickelson is your typical Alpha Male. Driven to succeed. Persistence, to him, is a virtue. To give up and accept what he sees as defeat isn't an option. That is augmented by above average intelligence and the belief, in his mind, that there is no such thing as a no-win scenario."

"He is very much like yourself, Jim."

"Funny, McCoy said something like that when he brought back the man's psyche eval from his Academy days."

"However there is one large difference between yourself and the lieutenant commander."

"Glad you noticed, Spock," Kirk smiled. He pointed to the accumulated data he'd handed over as his first officer scrolled through it. "Apparently three women have transferred out from under his direct command since he came on board two years ago. And one other female even transferred off the ship entirely." Kirk took his right fist and punched his left open hand. "How in the hell didn't I see this, Spock?"

He saw the telltale signs of guilt in his friend. "Individuals transfer quite often and for varied reasons. If they do not list the true reason for their transfer, how is it the captain may know?"

"No, Spock. This is _my_ ship. And what happens on my ship- everything that happens on my ship -is my responsibility." He admitted, "I need Uhura's help. If she presses charges I can order an official on-the-books investigation be done."

"I will speak with her, Captain."

"Well let's go and take care of this with him now," said Kirk as he went to leave his quarters. "Maybe if we can make some kind of deal with him to get psychiatric intervention-"

"Sir," said Spock almost uncomfortably before they could reach the door. He was suddenly standing at attention. "I must report that the lieutenant had another assignment in the lab early in the a.m."

He nodded proudly. "That's our lieutenant."

"Sir," he said, "I must also report that I was with her in the lab at that time and Mickelson walked in on us."

Jim stopped in his tracks, openly shocked. At first he couldn't even get any words out. "Spock!" he finally said, "You two weren't _engaged_ in-"

"Sir!" he answered, openly scandalized. "We are officers. One of us was in the middle of an urgent part of her duties."

The captain calmed down. "All right, so then tell me why this walk-in was possibly scandalous, Mr. Spock."

"I was seated in the one chair," he answered.

"So?"

"The lieutenant, as a result, was seated on me while she was working. We were, of course, fully clothed. That is the extent of our indiscretion."

He hadn't expected to hear that and couldn't help seeing the mental picture of his communications officer sitting in the lap of his first officer. "Oh," he said as he nodded. "Well then. I think I'll do the honors myself today."

"Yes, it does seem to appear to interfere with my duties toward Mickelson," acknowledged Spock.

"We can't have him saying you bullied him into staying away from your girl. But don't worry, I'll tell the lieutenant commander to keep his filthy thoughts off your woman with extra authority."

"We cannot help his thoughts, Captain," Spock said regretfully.

"Well I'll tell him to stop bothering our Uhura. Scotty and Sulu were discussing actually running the lieutenant commander's face into a fencepost the first chance they get if he doesn't stop harassing their favorite communications officer."

Spock was aware of the protectiveness of the males of the bridge crew toward Uhura, but he didn't know it ran that deep. "You did, of course, inform them they were out of order."

"Of course," said Kirk. "But I don't think I can blame them, Spock. This guy's arrogance seems to know no bounds."

"I am certain once you speak with him today his pursuit will end."

But the captain saw in Spock's eyes what he hadn't said. His eyes said if the man didn't stop his pursuit of Uhura, he was going to be forced to make him stop.

####

Mickelson saw the Captain approaching him in the rec room. "May I speak with you, Lieutenant Commander?" he asked very courteously.

"Yes, sir," answered Mickelson.

They walked off to the side. "There have been some complaints of your behavior toward my communications officer," the captain began.

"There's no law against trying to talk to a pretty lady, sir," he said with a wide, charming smile.

"It is if she's let you know on more than one occasion that she isn't interested."

He was starting to look slightly annoyed. "Sir, I didn't want to say anything, but she always seems mighty happy to have me around when I _do_ show up. And whoever she's with isn't satisfying her because she obviously thinks she needs to put the moves on your cold robot of a first officer, too."

"That's enough, Mister," Kirk addressed Mickelson. "Who do you think you're kidding? I know my communications officer well. She's served under me on this ship for over four years. It's been by the mercy of the lieutenant herself that you have not been brought up on charges _yet_," said Kirk. "Some of her fellow bridge officers are like brothers to her and would like nothing more than to rearrange your face for the way you've behaved toward her. Fortunately, I maintain order on my ship so that will never happen." The Captain then softened a bit and said, "Mickelson, there's a ship _full of women_ here, man. Why waste time on one who isn't interested?"

The man only nodded in the affirmative as he said, "You're right about that one, sir."

"If the lieutenant presses charges, we'll make a deal so you don't lose your career in Starfleet. But you have to undergo psychiatric evaluation and treatment for this disorder."

"All on the word of one _woman_?" asked Mickelson, outraged.

Kirk's face turned dark. "Do you think I was careless enough to speak with you without digging into your records? You obviously have a problem. Years ago this was considered criminal activity. We know now it is simply a form of deviancy which can be treated effectively with several therapies. So either you get help or you ship out of the fleet. I'm not letting someone with this problem remain on my ship or in that uniform. Is that clear?"

He nodded, looking defeated. "Yes, sir."

###

Spock made his way to her quarters. He'd told her to report directly to bed after her shift but as he let himself in he saw her there, awake and engaged in some form of calculations on a data PADD. "I admire your work ethic," he said. "But you are in grave need of rest. The captain himself also told you that you must rest." As he approached where she sat on her bunk he informed her, "You are disobeying a direct order, lieutenant."

She gave him a saucy smile. "What are you going to do about my disobeying you, Spock? Punish me?" She stood up quite suggestively and put her hands on her hips. "What form will that punishment take? Do you think you'll... _spank_ me?"

His eyes closed briefly as he forced down the reaction he wanted to have. "Do not dangle temptation before me, Nyota." But he did extend his two fingers to hers.

She looked at him, askance. She remembered then that she'd seen his parents touch fingers and then held her two fingers up to his. Their fingers connected and she felt the hum of something pass between them. "Oh my goodness," she said as she pulled her hand away for a second. "That was amazing!" she said as she put down her data PADD. She put her fingers out to his that time and they touched, again.

He was marveling in her discovery of the empathic connection, she was so honestly awestruck by it. To see her so taken with something from his people made him want to do more than touch fingers. "Nyota, may we discuss something?"

She moved to sit back on her bunk and then scooted over. "Sure. Sit with me."

He sat directly next to her as his arms encircled her and pulled her in close to him. "Are you any closer to agreeing to bond with me now than you were when we first came together?"

She relaxed into his embrace and admitted, "Yes, I'm closer. But there are some things we need to do before we get to that level, Spock."

He gradually lay back until he was lying down and gently took her with him. "Such as?"

She saw what he was doing to make her rest and couldn't help but smile over at him. "You're so pushy!" When they were finally lying all the way down she turned until they were face to face. "Well I need to tell my family about us. I've already told them I'm seeing someone seriously, but they don't know who. And you need to tell your family about us. And then there's the crew, that's a whole other factor we haven't even had time to get into."

"I do not understand why we cannot bond first and tell everyone later."

She gave him a tiny shove to the shoulder. "I should kick you out of bed just for saying that."

He saw she was smiling and knew she was not truly angry. "If you wish for us to inform our families and even to have them meet, I am amenable to that. However, Nyota, I must admit I do not think I can hold back my instincts for much longer."

She sighed contemplatively. "Well if it's your instincts we're fighting, that means we need to tell our families sooner rather than later."

"Perhaps we may bond and then have a permanent ceremony afterward."

She smiled up at him but then frowned. She was growing nervous. "What do you think your parents are going to say about us?"

"My parents will accept the news."

"Accepting and welcoming are two different things, Spock. I know my father will be fine with us. Shocked, but fine. My sister will be screaming with joy. Now my brothers…they're a little protective of me."

"As is correct," he said.

She turned from him until her back faced his front. "Don't ever encourage them," she laughed as his hand encircled her midsection and rested on her stomach. "But if someone doesn't like it, at least on my side, I can honestly tell you, up front, I won't tolerate anyone saying anything bad about you or my being with you."

He pulled her in closer to him as his chin rested at the top of her head. "I too promise to remain with you against all odds, Nyota."

She exhaled in relief. "Well the ship will be going into space dock in less than 10 months and it'll be the end of the five year mission. Will you sign on again once she's refitted?"

"I previously assumed I would. But now with the advent of 'us', I do not know," he admitted.

"What made you change your mind? I'd never ask you to leave Starfleet if you didn't want to."

"Do _you_ wish to return for another five years?" he asked.

She shrugged. "That depends."

"And what is this condition?"

"If I'm carrying Spock Junior I don't think I want to be on a starship," she laughed.

With those words, his emotions overwhelmed him and he found himself turning her over until she was lying flat on her back looking up at him. "Do you wish to, Nyota? Do you sincerely wish to bear me a child?" he asked as he looked down at her, eyes aflame with something she had never seen before.

She hadn't expected him to take it this way. "At least one. I was thinking about possibly bearing you two maybe three children, if we can. I don't know if we even _can_. Can we?"

He was amazed that she wished to have children by him. He could not help but be inordinately pleased as his fingers traced her round ear. "If our efforts are fruitless perhaps when the Enterprise goes in for her refit we may then go to a geneticist for help in the meantime. It will take them a minimum of four months to get the ship ready for another departure."

She found herself blushing. "I can't believe we're talking about having _babies_."

"Nyota, we must change the subject," he said as he began to shifty uncomfortably.

"Why, Spock?"

"Thinking of producing children with you makes me wish to engage in the act that produces children." She laughed up at him. "We must now speak of another matter."

She saw how serious he'd become and knew it couldn't be good. "Oh, what now?" she asked in dread.

"The captain wishes for you to press formal charges against Mickelson."

"The captain? Why?"

He briefly informed her of the things the captain had dug up in his unofficial investigation. "If you do so," he finished, "a true investigation can be launched. Mickleson will then be ordered for psychiatric testing and treatment in order to repair his obsessive tendencies and his probable abuse of power as indicated by the amount of females who have fled his command in less than thirty months."

"Seeing how he might have done this before-" she began to say and then paused as she thought about it. She ran her hands over her tired face and eyes. This was now more baggage on top of a pile of that was already too much to carry. But the captain needed her help. She sighed. "I can't let him do this to someone else again."

"So you will do as the captain wishes?"

She sighed nervously. "Yes, I will."

He lay next to her again, "You will sleep now?" he asked.

She saw the worry in his eyes. "Yes. I'll sleep now." She turned over onto her side and let the tiredness take her.


	9. Chapter 9

_A/N – Special shout-out to JADA91 for being my 50__th__ reviewer!_

Uhura sat at her station on the bridge. She got up first thing that morning and filed those charges against Mickelson. It added more stress on top of the strain she was already feeling. She didn't understand why, but knowing that everyone wanted her to file them still didn't make her feel any better about the situation. She turned her head and noticed that Spock was watching her out of the corner of his eye. He had been monitoring her closely, worried about her lack of sleep.

At least the night before she'd been able to get a full night of rest. There had been no activity from that agent in the field. The sleep helped her put everything into perspective. She realized that the captain was right. Mickelson was one sick puppy and just needed prompting to get some help. And hopefully this was the prompt he needed.

####

"You looked kind of funny in your message," said Nara. "What's going on?"

Nyota stared at the face of her sister on the screen. The call had come all the way from Earth and since she had already completed her bridge duty for the day she was able to take it in her quarters. "Too much is going on."

"All right, I know you're in the middle of some taxing stuff that's keeping you awake all of the time, you told me that the last time we talked. And I know you're not allowed to tell me what it is, top secret, classified and all that. All right, fine. But what else is going on? You look _stressed_ OUT."

Nyota sighed tiredly. Her and her sister had always been close. They were only one year a part, Nyota having been conceived not three months after Nara was born. "Remember that creep I mentioned?"

"Yes, that Mickel-whatever person?"

"Mickelson. Well I filed charges against him today for the harassment."

Her face burst into a wide beautiful smile that looked so much like the lieutenant's. "Good for you!"

"Then why do I feel so awful about it?"

"You know no one wants to get caught up in the middle of drama like that. So you're going through that, _and_ that stuff that's keeping you awake so often, and then you told me last time we talked that you're seeing someone seriously? That's a lot to be going through all at once. One at a time is one thing, but all at once? You're headed straight for a break-down," she said as she nodded knowingly.

"Oh, Nara, it's not that bad."

"Not that bad? Why the hell are _you_ the one looking like the cat that ate the canary when you're the damn canary in this? That man had no business harassing you like that. And you_ told_ him more than once to leave you the hell alone and he didn't. So this is what he gets."

She couldn't help but to start laughing. Trust Nara to be the one to always make her smile. "As to the guy I'm seeing seriously-"

"Yeeeees?" her sister said with a big grin. "Who is it?"

"Spock."

Her sister's face fell and she sucked her teeth. "Girl, stop joking. I ain't got time for this. The baby is going to wake up any minute now. Seriously, who have you been seeing?"

Nyota's eyes widened. Her sister really thought she was joking. "Well is it because he's a Vulcan?"

Then Nara's own eyes widened, again looking very much like her sister. "For real, girl? Are you really dating that delicious Vulcan?"

Nyota couldn't help the spontaneous burst of laughter that fell out of her. "You're so _bad_!"

"Everyone knows I'm the bad one!" she joked. Then her face grew serious. "Are you really going out with Mister Spock?" She had only ever met him once. He hadn't said or done anything to offend her. She just never got the vibe off of him that he was into her sister.

"I am."

"How serious are things?" she asked.

"I think I'm going to marry him," said Nyota.

Her sister's eyes widened again. "Did he ask?"

"Pretty much it's up to me whenever I want to get it done. He's so sure about us!" she said with a frown. "But Vulcans don't get married the way that we do."

"Oh, don't they do that brain voodoo?"

"Yes, it is a _meld_ that's done to make a permanent marriage bond," she corrected.

"Well, whatever! He better treat you right, that's all I know."

"I've never been treated better. I'm respected, listened to and-" She remembered him telling her in his tongue that she was the other half of his soul. She lost her breath for one second. "We're being careful for now, though."

Nyota's little gasp and the expression on her face when she'd thought of Spock didn't escape Nara. "Hmmm. So I see. It's like_ that_ between you two?" She nodded in disbelief. "Who would ever think you could have something like that with a Vulcan? But you know what they say. Still waters run deep. And that man's waters are definitely still."

"What do you think dad's going to say?"

Her sister waved off her words. "He'll be fine. It's Feisal and Amar you need to be worried about. Those two are so ridiculous when it comes to us. Did I ever tell you what happened to that last guy I was dating before Gavin and I got together and got married?"

Her stomach sank. "No, what?"

"I went upstairs to go get my sweater and our brothers were at dad's visiting that day. Do you know those ridiculous men had the nerve to pull out a brand new chainsaw and show it to him? I was on my way back downstairs just in time the see the back of my date flying out of the front door."

Nyota couldn't help but laugh. "What!"

"They_ claimed_ they were just showing him the new piece of hardware they'd picked up from the shop. I've never seen someone run that fast before," she said as she also began to laugh.

"What did they do when they met Gavin?" asked Nyota. She had only ever met her brother-in-law over subspace communication but had yet to see him up close and personal. But she already liked him.

"They showed him the chainsaw, too, and Gavin goes and asks if they'll crank it up for his benefit. He was in after that. They rode him for about a month about everything, even his being from Scotland. But then they were okay with him. Goodness, what are they going to do to a Vulcan?" Nara asked with half a worried expression.

"One thing about Spock, he can take care of himself."

Nara looked excited. "Can I tell dad about Spock? Oh, can I can I?" her sister begged.

"No!" Nyota pointed at the screen. "Keep your lips sealed. Once I get past all this stress I'll call daddy and the boys and tell them myself."

Her sister gave off an exhale of defeat. "Oh, all right, fine. But you better do it soon. You know I never was any good at keeping a juicy secret."

####

Spock went to the mess hall. He knew Uhura was on a subspace call with her sister and wanted to give her a chance to inform her sibling about the two of them. He was planning on calling his parents about her later that evening. He knew that Nyota wanted to wait until either the situation with the undercover agent or the sexual harassment case was done before they talked again about an actual bonding date. He couldn't blame her. She was under a lot of stress and just one more stressful situation would be enough to cause a tailspin into emotional turmoil. All things considered, she was handling everything admirably. She had mentioned over a month before wanting to be more like him in the way she handled her emotions. But he had to concede, she was even stronger than he originally thought.

####

Uhura decided she wanted to see if she could catch Spock in the mess hall. She left her quarters and as soon as she turned the corner to get to the turbolift, there was Mickelson, standing there. A wave of fear crashed over her, but another part of her was calculating how long it would take for her to make it to the turbolift; another part was calculating if it would be better to make it down the hall and back to her quarters; and yet another part of her was trying to judge the distance between herself and the hallway intercom system.

"Nyota," he said with a half frown. "I heard about those charges you filed against me." She quickly turned and rapidly walked in the direction where there should have been more people. She could hear his footsteps behind her. "I'm talking to you!" he was saying, obviously angry. "You think you're going to do this and get away with it, don't you?"

She walked faster and could hear him also walking faster. Another leap of fear jumped through her and she was practically running down the corridor, trying to get to…where? This was a starship. The only way to anywhere was a turbolift or a Jeffries tube. And there was no way she was getting into a turbolift with that lunatic! Her brain was frozen with fear, but her Starfleet training asserted itself.

She turned quickly and put one hand up. "Stop!" she shouted. And he actually stopped in his tracks. "Get away from me! Turn around and go in the opposite direction."

But he began to advance again with a look of rage on his face. "You think you can tell me what I should and shouldn't do? I'll show you what a woman like you deserves," he said in a low tone. She was backpedaling as fast as she could, but Mickelson advanced on her position and caught up with her quickly. He grabbed her by the arms and squeezed hard enough to make her cry out.

She did the only things she could think of. Her head shot upward and into his lower jaw. As he yelped and let her go, she began backing up cautiously, waiting for his next attack. Every crew quarter she passed as she backed up she hit each chimer one after the other after another. She was only able to hit about five. But it was enough.

Two crewmen stuck their heads out of separate doors just then. "What's going on here?" asked one. She saw it was Kimo Toere, a member of security.

"Toere, call security!" Uhura shouted.

"Get back in your room and mind your own business, that's an order!" Mickelson countermanded as he went to advance on her again.

But the other crewman, someone new to the _Enterprise_, saw the look on Uhura's face. He came out of his quarters quickly and walked up the hallway, stood in front of the communications chief. "No, sir," said the young man. "Don't come any closer to her."

The one named Kimo stepped out into the hallway and snapped open the intercom channel. "Toere to security, come to my quarters. I think we have a situation here."

Mickelson tried to take off down the hall. Toere grabbed his arm and did a simple aikido maneuver, flipping the superior officer over and onto the ground. "Don't move, sir!" warned the off-duty security man as he pointed at the lieutenant commander, "or I'll be forced to physically restrain you."

"I'll have you up on charges for this," threatened a very outraged Mickelson.

"Sir, you were attempting to flee the scene of…whatever this was going on. I'm doing my duty. Now you do yours and wait for security. You tell them why the lieutenant was running away from you."

"I'll tell you why!" said Mickelson as he looked up and at her. "She's afraid to be with a _real_ man. Instead she decided she's going to get into bed with a damned cold Vulcan." He began to laugh a little maniacally. "A woman like you, you don't deserve a good man. You deserve exactly what you've picked; a substandard, subhuman, half-breed with no feelings. Have a nice life with your block of ice, bitch!"

"You think you're a _real_ man?" Uhura asked as she stood there, getting angrier by the minute. "Maybe in your imagination, _sir_!" She was so angry she didn't even know what to say next. It really was just too much.

####

Dr. McCoy called Jim Kirk to sickbay. "What's going on, Bones?" he asked into the intercom.

"Security says there was an attempted attack. They've got Mickelson in the brig and I've got Uhura here in sickbay."

"On my way, Bones." He paused. "Is Spock there?"

"No, why would he be?"

"On my way." He snapped the connection shut and then reopened it to the ship wide channel. "Mr. Spock to sickbay," he announced over the ship's intercom system. "Mr. Spock, report to sickbay."

####

Spock frowned as he approached the doors. Why was he being summoned here, of all places? He wondered if the Captain had had some sort of accident. But that made no sense. It was the captain himself that had summoned him here, not McCoy.

As the doors to sickbay opened, he saw Nyota sitting on a biobed. Her knees were curled up into her chest and she had a blanket wrapped tightly around her shoulders. His blood froze in his veins. "What are you doing here, Spock?" demanded McCoy. "Why in the hell did the captain call you?" he asked as the Vulcan walked past him.

"What has happened?" he asked as his eyes held Nyota's and he quickly approached her bedside.

Christine Chapel said, "She was attacked in the hallway by Mickelson-"

"Attempted, _attempted_!" Uhura kept saying. "If it wasn't for Toere and Jameson… Well why think of 'what ifs'?" she asked as she shuddered. With her adrenaline decreasing she was beginning to feel the effects of what had just happened.

The nurse walked away but Spock remained. "Nyota?" he called to her in a soft tone laced with restrained worry.

She looked up at his eyes. Spock's eyes. They were haunted with…something. She slowly put out her hand and extended two fingers just as the captain entered the room. She didn't care. She felt Spock's fingers contact hers and finally the shakes really began.

"McCoy, I've already been to security and gotten their side of things. Mickelson, of course, is claiming he hasn't done anything wrong," said the Captain. "Did she say anything?" he asked as he looked over at Uhura sitting there with her knees drawn up to her chest. She was clutching a blanket around her and Spock was standing there, obstructing the full view of her from everyone else.

"She's had a real scare, Jim. She's got a mild concussion and she's starting to get some bruises on her arms- I've seen her go through worse and pop back up fast, so her reaction to this is out of the ordinary for her. I've never seen Uhura act this way, Jim."

Kirk turned and saw Spock still standing in the same position. They were both speaking in low tones with one another. "She has nothing left to spare to help her bounce back quickly like she always does. I should have lifted her from bridge duty a week ago," he admitted.

"She'd have protested, Jim."

He nodded. "Yes, I know."

"In the meantime, would you mind telling me why you called Spock here to sickbay?"

"I'm not at liberty to discuss Spock's personal life but if you stick around you'll find out on your own."

McCoy, for once, was speechless.

Spock wanted to lift her from the biobed and take her back to his quarters. But that would not have been logical. She needed medical attention for the time being and they needed to also ensure she did not go into psychological shock. "I will not leave you," he promised.

It took all her might not to do something overly emotional like wrap her arms around him right then and there. "I'll try and control myself better," she whispered.

"Nyota!" he said, his tone bordering on affronted as he stepped as closely to the biobed as he could. "Do not be concerned with your reactions. You may show your true self to me at all times."

Her knees were still drawn up to her chest as she continued to have the shakes. "Why can't I stop shaking?" she asked. "Nothing too bad happened so why can't I stop shaking?" Spock took his entire hand then and grasped hers. He opened empathic contact with her and began sending small waves of comfort at her in short bursts so as not to overwhelm her.

McCoy approached then and noticed Spock's hand in Nyota's. Well what did that mean? He'd never seen Spock comfort anyone else in sickbay like _this_. He turned himself and his mind back to his patient, "Hey, Lieutenant, I'm going to give you a shot of something so you can relax, all right?"

She looked over at him, wary. "I don't think I should do that right now," she said. "The lab might have to call me and-"

"Don't worry," he reassured her. "I can revive you quickly if necessary, all right?"

"Allow the doctor to treat you, Nyota," Spock interjected.

She looked over at him and then back at McCoy. "All right, sir. That'll be fine." She felt the sting and heard the hiss of the hypospray. Within seconds, her body began to relax and Spock was helping her into a lying down position, pulling the blanket around to cover her body fully.

"Sleep now," she heard his voice in her ear.

"Please don't leave me," she whispered.

"I will not," he promised. Even after she fell asleep, her hand remained attached to his.

####

"Well, Jim, care to tell me how long _that's_ been going on?" McCoy asked as he inclined his head in the direction of Uhura and Spock.

He shrugged. "It's still new to me, Bones. I only just found out. Any questions? Ask Spock."

The doctor smiled. "I never knew he had it in him…I never knew she had it in _her_!"

"I have it on good authority he's quite sought after by the ladies, McCoy."

"The strong silent type," he mused. "And one can be sought, Jim, it doesn't mean he's going to give in. Strange to see him having given in, that's all, and especially to someone like Uhura. Warm, vivacious, full of mischief. I thought Captain Pike's Number One was more his type."

Jim nodded. "Those two were too much alike, McCoy. They don't say opposites attract for nothing."

"Well I don't mean to bring this part of our conversation to a screeching halt, but I've seen Spock in the throws of a jealous protective stint. Keep him away from Mickelson, that's all I've got to say."

"In your medical opinion what do you recommend we do with Mickelson? I know what regulations, say, but I also know the medical officer holds sway in these cases."

"If it were up to me, Jim, he'd be on a one-way ticket to a Federation Funny Farm. But he's entitled to a full investigation, I know that. As apart of the investigation he gets a whole new psych evaluation. If his condition is found to be easily treated, he can remain in the service so long as he receives his treatment during the specified times. Otherwise, he's going to get drummed out."

"How didn't I see this coming, McCoy? I begged her to press charges and then I didn't protect her. What the hell was I thinking?" he asked as he shook his head.

"Jim, this sort of thing isn't as common as it used to be. We're not used to dealing with this anymore. As a result all our guards were down."

"Including his," said Kirk as he turned in the direction of Spock. "Right now, no one is blaming themselves as much as he is."

"Just keep him away from Mickelson. If Spock gets his hands on him, he'll kill him. Literally."


	10. Chapter 10

_A/N - Sorry it took so long for me to update. My son got sick and I had to take care of my little man._

Uhura awoke to blurred vision. She could only make out the smudged impression of someone standing over her! Fear was the first reaction and she struck out with a hand and screamed. "It's just me, Uhura," she heard McCoy's calming voice. "I'm trying to run a scanner over you to see how I can best treat your concussion. You weren't even supposed to be up yet. Your adrenaline is still through the roof so you must have burned off the sedative too quickly."

"I'm sorry, Leonard. Did I _hit_ you?" she asked, horrified.

"Only my scanner," he reassured her as he continued to assess her injury.

"Where's Spock?" was her next question. She pulled the blanket up around her shoulders. At least the shakes were gone. "When can I go back to my quarters? Do I have to stay here?"

"Ironic you asked when you can go back to your quarters because I've already authorized your release on the condition that Spock himself ensures you stay in bed for the next 48 hours. He's filling out the paperwork now to get you out of here."

"But the communications lab-"

"-can get stuffed," he finished. "You're on doctor's orders, miss. I've heard Junior Lieutenant Grimes is a mighty fine communications officer and of course he is because you're the one who trained him. The captain says Grimes can sign off on everything for the next 72 hours if it's needed. You've got enough codes saved, according to Spock, so really you're not necessary to the lab, or the bridge, for the next 72 hours. According to my exam, you were already overextended, physically exhausted and sleep deprived. If Mickelson weren't such a sick asshole I'd give him a medal for forcing you to lie down without Starfleet being able to be up your backside about it."

She seemed to be thinking about what she was going to say next before she did. And then, "What's going to happen to him, Leonard?" spilled out. She looked very concerned.

He put down his scanner. "You really do care, don't you, Nyota?" he asked softly. "He wasn't exactly wishing you well in that hallway." He continued working on her with an instrument to mend the traumatized area of her brain. "Once word spread of your bringing him up on charges and what he did to you, two ladies currently serving under him came forward about his treatment of them. And I just got word that another one that transferred from his department a few months back has also filed her own charges. Jim is trying to track down the one that actually transferred off-ship to find out the real reason why."

"Off the ship?" asked Uhura, shocked.

"Apparently she was serving under him and after less than a year she transferred right off the _Enterprise_. He wants to know if it was because of Mickelson. If it is, he wants that officer back. She was pretty darn good and he wants her here so she can take over for him now." McCoy looked down at her with a twinkle in his eye. "But of course you didn't hear any of this gossip from your friendly country doctor."

She smiled for the first time since the attack. "I understand."

"Well if he agrees and takes a plea, he can get psychiatric help. Once he's done with the therapies and proper medical regimen, if he's certified as cured, he can return to his Starfleet career."

"Is that possible?"

"It wasn't possible even decades ago, but it is now." He sighed. "Look, Uhura, I don't want you beating yourself up for any of this. If anything you've just saved countless other officers from being mistreated for years to come." The door to sickbay swung open and Spock entered as the doctor continued, "If it weren't for you, who knows what he would have gone on to do, eventually? You should be proud that you stood up for yourself. That and I can tell you from my physical examination of him, you gave him a pretty nice uppercut to the chin with your head. Gave you a little bit of a concussion, but you should see the bruise _he's _sporting. It's a real beauty!"

She found herself laughing as Spock walked up to them. "You are well, Nyota?" he asked.

"I've got a headache," she admitted. "And why do my arms hurt like this?" she asked as she pulled her arms out from under the blanket. They all saw the angry looking dark purplish bruises in the middle of forming. She gasped. "I forgot about him grabbing me by the arms. I guess he _was_ squeezing as hard as it felt like he was."

Spock's eyes grew fierce. "He touched and damaged you to this extreme?" asked the commander in a voice that was still very contained. But as he looked down at the bruises on both arms, his instincts were kicking into overdrive. All his mind continued to circle around over and over was the fact that she was physically harmed. _He touched my ashayam and bruised her…__**he bruised her flesh!**_ His ancient self had been lurking in the background, until then, deceptively silent. It was fully awake and vocal now, clamoring for blood, telling him to go down to security, go into the cell and wrap his hands around Mickelson's neck and squeeze until—

"Don't you dare," said Uhura as she grabbed his arm, snapping him out of his thoughts.

"Nyota," he said. "I only wish to-"

"No, you will not. He's sick and he's going to get the help he needs."

"I, too, wish to 'help' the lieutenant commander," said Mr. Spock with a look in his eyes that was dangerously feral.

She realized then that if she wanted to, she could really hurt someone else by using him to do it. But she wasn't that kind of woman and the last thing she wanted was Spock in trouble because of her sanctioning his primal side. She used the only thing she had in her arsenal. "Don't you think it would be better if you stayed with me? It would make me feel much safer, if you stayed with me," she said with a pleading look on her face.

Spock seemed as if he were struggling with something. It was not logic that beat back the primal side and won. It was those pleading eyes she was giving him, asking him to remain at her side and not leave. He relented. "I will not harm him… for your sake."

She smiled up at him. "Thank you."

McCoy then said, "What she needs is three days of nonstop rest, relaxation and food. She's not allowed to get out of bed, Spock."

"She will rest in my quarters so that I may take proper care of her. The lieutenant always seems to find some form of work to accomplish despite being told to rest," he said despite the fact that he saw her rolling her eyes at the two of them.

"Excellent," said McCoy. "Now Nyota," he turned to her with a genteel smile, "you go with the nice Vulcan and do what he tells you to."

Despite her annoyance, she found herself laughing again. "Leonard, that's twice now. Why are you making me laugh while my head still hurts?"

"Sometimes laughter is the best medicine." He looked over at Spock. "Though I don't know how that's going to happen with _him _around."

"You be nice, doctor," she giggled.

"Spock, can I have a quick word with you before you take the lieutenant from under my excellent care?" he asked with a smile.

The two men went into his office and the door slid shut. He was not as jolly as he'd just been with Uhura. He got the point, "She's going to have nightmares, Spock. They may or may not start immediately, but I just thought I'd warn you about the side-effects of a situation like this. She's going to vacillate between being her normal self and sometimes crying for what appears to be no reason. She's a candidate for a classic case of post-traumatic stress disorder. The lieutenant was already run-down when this situation finally fell into her lap and that makes everything even worse."

"I will do all that is necessary to ensure her comfort, doctor."

"I know you'll take good care of her, Spock. You seem to have an excellent bedside manner, especially with her."

"Your confidence is reassuring, doctor."

"Well don't get used to it, you green-blooded Vulcan," he said for old times sake. He grew serious again. "Go on. Take your woman home. And by the way, no strenuous activity for _her_ until she's ready."

Instead of answering verbally, Spock simply looked back at the doctor and raised one eyebrow.

####

Uhura walked back to Spock's quarters with him. She thought that it was a great thing she would be able to stay with him in his quarters for the time-being. The thought of going back to her quarters, to that stretch of hallway where everything took place… she shuddered.

He noticed her shiver and asked, "You are well, Nyota? Is the temperature in the hallways insufficient to your comfort level?"

"I'm fine," she reassured him. But she wasn't. She wanted to get behind closed doors as soon as possible. Crewmen were passing them by as they walked together. Some were smiling at her and saying as they passed, "Get well soon, lieutenant." Some were simply staring at her and Spock. She could tell the rumors were already circulating about the two of them. She just wanted to get behind closed doors and not have the eyes of so many people on her. As soon as they entered his quarters and she felt the warmth of the elevated temperature sinking into her, she relaxed and heaved a sigh of relief.

Spock took Nyota's hand and led her to his bed. He wished these were different circumstances under which he was putting her into his bed, but he made certain to engage every control he had so as not to entertain these thoughts. "You must rest. Please lie down," he said softly as he noticed her standing there, hesitating.

She was about to, but then looked up at him and her eyes finally filled with tears. She did what she wanted to do ever since she'd seen him walk into the sickbay. She put her arms around him, lay her head on his chest and squeezed. Her hands ran up his back and the feeling of his warm body and muscle sinew underneath her hands reassured her need to release her feelings.

All he could hear was her gasping through her tears, the start and stop of her breaths. He found himself encircling his arms around her, holding her close to him. He knew it was important for her to let the tears wash out of her body. He bent down then, lifted her into his arms and sat on his bed with her in his lap. He kept her encased in his arms and found himself doing what his mother used to do when he was very little and still given to extreme fits of emotion. "Shhhh," he blew into her ear as he pulled her even closer to himself.

By the time her tears were spent, she found herself hiccupping and wishing she had something to wash her face with. She scrambled up and away from him and ran into his bathroom to clean herself up quickly. As she turned on the water and bent over to wash her face, a wave of dizziness overtook her. Spock was right behind her, steadying her by holding onto her shoulders. He took a clean cloth, wet it down and gently cleaned her face. "That is sufficient?" he asked softly. She nodded once and halfway smiled up at him. She let him take her hand and lead her to his bed. "Rest, Nyota," he said as she lay herself down.

He lay down next to her and put his arm around her, pulled her in close, smelled her hair. "You are with me," he said as if he were still having trouble believing it.

"Spock," she finally spoke, "I hope I'm not imposing on you. I hope you don't mind that I'm here."

"Nyota, you are having a difficult time now. But you must understand that as a result of what has happened to you, I now have the indelible instinct to keep you at my side at all times. You are not imposing on me. If you did not remain with me at this time, _that_ would be the imposition."

The way this man could put things… She smiled at him and found herself touching every plane of his face with her fingertips. "How is it possible for me to be so happy and so miserable at the same time?" She swallowed back another jag of tears.

He kissed her chastely on the forehead and turned over onto his back. She repositioned herself so she was lying halfway on his chest, her arm around him. She put her head where his heart would have been if he'd been full Human. He was so very…warm. As he draped his heavy arm over her back, between that and the heat of his body, she was becoming nice and drowsy. She found herself drifting into sleep.

Spock had not yet allowed himself to sleep or meditate. An hour after Nyota drifted off, he heard her begin to moan in her sleep while moving fitfully. As she sat up fast, her eyes snapped open and she inhaled one large sharp breath.

He sat up, as well. "You are unwell," he said as he lay her back down. "But I will remain on the watch. Please, rest again."

She swallowed. "I'm having a little bit of a hard time," she admitted as she looked up at him, grateful for his presence because she was afraid though she knew there was no longer any reason to be afraid. Mickelson was in custody and she was here with the one she loved. But she was still afraid.

Spock got up then bent over and pulled a blanket up to her chin. He crossed his room then and retrieved his lyre. He began to tune it as she turned over onto the side that she could better view him. He sat in a chair and finished tuning the instrument. He then began to slowly play a melody she only halfway recognized. She had learned the beginning of this piece sometime ago when she used to come to his quarters to learn to play that very instrument. But this version was fuller, richer, much more complicated…longer.

It started out quite simple, benign. As time went on, the melody blended and became soft, alluring, almost sensual. The music began to relax her and she found her eyes fighting to close, little by little. The music then turned introspective, ordered, undeniably logical. It picked up a common rhythm running through it and continued with that theme as it returned to where it had begun. Once he was finished with the piece, he saw that Nyota had fallen back into sleep.

He stayed up half the night playing his lyre for her, song after song he hadn't played in years. She didn't have another nightmare that evening.

####

Nyota awoke slowly and for a few seconds she didn't remember anything at all. Blissful ignorance enveloped her as she realized a rather impressive sized hand was splayed across her hip. The hand was nice and warm and she smiled at the feel of it. Her eyes snapped open quickly to see that she was not in her own quarters. Everything from the past day filtered back into her memory as she realized she was in Spock's quarters. He was spooned against the back of her, his breathing even. She found herself snuggling back into his warmth. His quarters were also quite warm, but she was used to hot weather. The heat relaxed her and made her feel as if she were home again.

She gingerly stood so as not to disturb him and made her way to his bathroom. She turned on his shower, divested herself of her uniform and stepped inside. The hot water felt so good against her skin. The night of sleep did her very well because she almost felt like a new woman. Almost.

After she had soaked and washed for the allotted time, she turned the shower off and then realized a very stark error on her part. She was standing in Spock's bathroom with no change of clothes. And no towel. Nothing. "Oh NO," she said under her breath.

The door to the bathroom opened only a slight bit as Spock's hand appeared with a large shirt. "I anticipated you might need this," he said.

She took it quite gratefully and slipped it over her head. It was so warm in his quarters she wasn't even chilled from the water on her skin.

####

"Don't you have to go to the bridge?" she asked as they walked to her quarters to retrieve a few things.

"Jim has generously given me the week off."

Her eyebrows rose in surprise. "The captain knows about us?"

"He was able to deduce that there was something different between us the day I ordered you to my quarters."

She was amazed. "He wasn't angry about it?"

"Nyota, we are both bridge officers. However, I am not your direct superior. We may be as social with one another as we wish."

She smiled. "I know some captains don't like this sort of thing, that's all."

"If there is one captain that understands the need for companionship, physical or otherwise, it is Captain Kirk."

Uhura read the joke between the lines and found herself laughing again as they entered her quarters. "How do you make me laugh so often?" she asked as she looked up at him in amazement.

"I do not know," he admitted. "But it pleases me to no end that I may be some source of joy to you." He paused for a second. "Do I, Nyota? Do I bring you joy?"

She paused and put the bag onto her bed she had just pulled from out of her closet. She walked over to him and put her arms around him as she looked up into his face. "You've made me so happy I don't even have words to describe it. This situation that's happened…I feel like I'm going to be just fine if I can have you here with me. I know I shouldn't feel this need, this reliance on you so quickly. I'd have scoffed at it if you told me a year ago that I'd depend on anyone this much, but with you it's not so simple. It's not about needing someone else. It's about me needing you."

"The sentiment is not one-sided, Nyota," he said as his lips tenderly kissed hers. He pulled himself back from anything more since he remembered that Dr. McCoy said she would be traumatized from her incident and he was unwilling to take anything she was not ready to give. "Shall I help you pack?"

"No," she said nonchalantly. "I'm fine." She began going through her closet and dresser, getting the clothing and supplies she needed. Then she ran into the bathroom and got everything she needed there.

As soon as she zipped up the bag, he took it from her hands to carry it back to his quarters. "Jim has volunteered to bring us breakfast this morning."

"The captain bringing us breakfast? I'm going to get spoiled!"

####

She was back on duty a week later, almost her old self. Two days after that, the situation with the agent in the field was officially over and done with. Within another two weeks she was smiling, socializing, singing in the rec room from time to time. She still fought off the occasional nightmare, but with time she could see they were honestly subsiding.

After Mickelson had been found guilty of sexual harassment, attempted sexual assault and stalking they dropped him off at the nearest star base. He was sentenced to three months in a psychiatric facility. They deemed that that was just enough time for him to receive intensive therapies to cure him of his tendencies. During that time, another woman from his last command on earth stepped forward with allegations.

Spock sat with the captain at a table in the mess hall. He was watching his Nyota across the room, verbally sparring and laughing with Scotty and Riley. Sulu sat with them, more interested in his food than the conversation.

"How's she doing, Spock?" asked the captain.

"The lieutenant no longer has need of my quarters."

Kirk was surprised. Was that regret he heard in Spock's voice? "I know it must have been terribly cramped in there with the two of you."

"Wonderfully so," said Spock.

She paused in the middle of her conversation and saw that she'd caught his eye. She winked once at him and then continued with her conversation. He most certainly did want the lieutenant back in his quarters. But it was necessary for them to live separately until they bonded. He was determined not to consummate until they bonded and he was determined not to bond until they returned to Earth or Vulcan. He could wait. He would wait.

END

_A/N – Don't kill me please! It felt right to end this here. But I have to admit, the saga of this Spock and Uhura is not over. Originally this was supposed to be 5 chapters, it wound up being 10. Originally I was only going to write this one story for them and then be done. But I'll be revisiting them in one or two one-shots and at least one long story as they enter different stages of their lives and relationship._

_As a matter of fact, I'm working on a one-shot for them now that's a bit Spock-centric. It's called 'Secret'. So keep an eye out for it. I'll always announce the next one I'm working on whenever I end one so you know what to look for, for those of you who are interested in following my A/U Spock/Uhura._

_Thank you so much for reading and the nice reviews. You've all been really generous. You people can make a writer get a swollen head!_


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